Jay Quote #1334
Quote from Jay in Kiss and Tell
Jay: And why is your father mad at me? Did I do something?
Alex: Probably. Isn't that your relationship? He's always desperate for your approval and you shoot him down?
Jay: It's supposed to be, but all of a sudden, he's, like... all cold. Wouldn't let me sit with him.
Alex: Ugh, so high school. Dad and I watched "Mean Girls" the other night, and I chewed off a piece of my hair reliving how awful it was. Wait. In the movie, the heroine takes down the head mean girl by being mean to her. Maybe that's what Dad is doing to you?
Jay: Son of a bitch.
[aside to camera:]
Jay: Phil thinks he can "Mean Girls" me? How lame is that? Let me tell you something... I might be a pretty face, but I fight to win. Just like "Legally Blonde"!
Modern Family Quotes
‘Kiss and Tell’ Quotes
Quote from Phil
Jay: How about a Mint "Jay-lep"?
Phil: I'll pass, seeing as I'm not a hundred-year-old Southern lady.
Jay: [laughs]
[aside to camera:]
Phil: I finally saw the movie "Mean Girls." I know. I'm a middle-aged man. How'd I wait so long? The point is, I realized I have a mean girl in my life... Jay. Like last week at this wedding, I'm rocking my moonwalk, and Jay yells, "Hey, look, it's Michael Jerkson." Enough's enough. How do you get a mean girl to stop being a mean girl? Be mean girlier.
Quote from Phil
Phil: [aside to camera] It was working, but it was killing me. I've actually had dreams where the only thing happening was me sitting with Jay while he, you know, tousles my hair, calling me "Sport."
Quote from Haley
Claire: You know, if something was on your mind, I'm an excellent person to confide in. No judgment. God knows I've done some stuff I'm not proud of.
Haley: [laughs] Like what?
Claire: J-Just like... shoplifting.
Haley: Wow. Really?
Claire: Mm-hmm.
Haley: I mean, no judgment here... I do it, too.
Claire: [chuckles] What? You do?
Haley: Yeah, but I'm very ethical about it. I only take things from companies that use child labor. That is how my generation is saving the world.