Mitchell Quote #800
Quote from Mitchell in Winner Winner Turkey Dinner
Cameron: No, I overheard the lady coach call her play on my walkie-talkie, and I changed my defense to win the game. And now I'm having anxiety, and I have to confess.
Mitchell: No, you you are not gonna confess. You're gonna smush that anxiety into a little ball, and you're gonna push it into that little, tiny hole in your soul where childhood traumas go. Everybody here is a winner. If you end up being the one loser at the table, I'm gonna get nothing but condescending pity from everybody. Especially Claire, that insufferable phony. [waves to Claire]
Modern Family Quotes
‘Winner Winner Turkey Dinner’ Quotes
Quote from Mitchell
Mitchell: [aside to camera] There- There is a backstory. In the summer of 1984, inspired by "The Karate Kid," I went through a martial arts phase. When Cam brought those nunchucks home, it was just too much to resist. 30 years later, once again, it was time to sweep the leg.
Quote from Jay
Principal: You said some pretty harsh things to Mrs. Barrish.
Jay: In my defense, um, this banquet she's planning is not historically accurate. For example, I don't remember a tandoori chicken option at the first Thanksgiving.
Principal: We have children here from many ethnicities, and we try to make them all feel included.
Jay: Be that as it may, history does not record Pocahontas asking John Smith to pass the sashimi roll while Myles Standish helps himself to gluten-free huevos rancheros!
[aside to camera:]
Jay: After that, it got heated, and we got expelled.
Joe: "We"?
Jay: But they'll call. They need my check.
Quote from Phil
Phil: If I can't do this trick, my magic shop is gonna be the laughingstock of the mini-mall. And there's still a Blockbuster there.