Phil Quote #1212
Phil: So, this is the post office, 'cause where else are they gonna get their "bills"? Of course, you got to waddle past this guy to get to the nail salon. And word on the street is they're putting in a Crossfit next door.
Lily: Why are these two eggs sticky?
Phil: Uh, because the neighbor's dog is a real slobberer, but lucky, he's not very fast.
Lily: My teacher says that there's no such thing as weird, just different.
Phil: Aw, that's a lovely random thought. I drew up plans for a Duckingham Palace, but I can't find them, so I guess we'll just have to "wing" it. [quacks]
Modern Family Quotes
‘She Crazy’ Quotes
Quote from Gloria
Gloria: Ay, what is it?!
Manny: You can always tell when something's wrong.
Gloria: What is her name?
Manny: Chelsea, the prettiest barista who's ever served me a double-shot half-caff caramel macchiato with a dusting of cinnamon. I want to talk to her, but whenever I do, all I can say is, "mmmm."
Gloria: Maybe you used up all your words ordering that coffee.
Quote from Jay
Jay: This show again?
Gloria: Yes. I don't know what it is. I love this character so much.
Jay: Who's the old crank?
Gloria: Her husband, of course.
Manny: Who's the disaster with the scarf?
Gloria: Her son, Pepito.
Manny: You at least look like your guy. My guy-
Jay: Can it, Pepito.
Quote from Dylan
Dylan: Morning, Dunphys. Oh, still no ducks, huh? Fascinating creatures. I just read a book about them.
Claire: You did?
Haley: Yes, mom. Dylan reads.
Dylan: It was my nephew's book. It was about a duck and a penguin who go on vacation together. You could touch the duck's fuzz.
Haley: Bloop-bloop!
Dylan: That's the sound she makes when she wants me to fast-forward.
Phil: I feel you, money. Claire does the same thing to me. I think it started when I was inventing that new dental floss.
Claire: Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop!
Dylan: So, the book said ducklings imprint on their mom as soon as they're born. Their brains are so small, they just latch on to something and follow it around as a way to find food. Yum.