Phil Quote #1208

Quote from Phil in The Closet Case

Phil: That's it! I'm done! Oh! Haley, Dylan, this little living arrangement of yours, it's not working out and it's about to change.
Haley: Dad, why are you freaking out?
Phil: Because I'm your father and I can't have the two of you sleeping together in the same room like it's no big deal. So, from now on, you're gonna show me the respect I deserve and sneak around behind my back.
Claire: Do what, now?
Haley: I don't understand.
Phil: Starting tonight, you're sleeping in Alex's room, and if there's any monkey business, better happen after I'm asleep.

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 ‘The Closet Case’ Quotes

Quote from Claire

Claire: [aside to camera] That was the moment I realized Phil wanted me to kick Dylan out so he could be the cool one. Well, I can be cool, too. I'm cooler than cool. I'm frigid.

Quote from Dylan

Haley: Also, we were kind of hoping that Dylan could stay in the basement with me for a little while.
Phil: Oh.
Haley: He's trying to save up to build inventory, and rent is killing him.
Dylan: It feels like they're asking for money, like, every six weeks.

 Phil Dunphy Quotes

Quote from En Garde

Phil: [aside to camera] What does it take to make a great salesman? It's no big secret. You just follow the ABC's of salesmanship: Always Be Closing. Don't Ever Forget Great Home Ideas Just Keep Lurking Mostly Nearby.
Often, People Question Realtors' Sincerity. Take Umbrage. Violators Will- Oh, shoot

Quote from Hit and Run

Phil: [aside to camera] I'll admit it. I'm turned on by powerful women: Michelle Obama, Oprah, Condoleezza Rice, Serena Williams... Wait a minute.