Jay Quote #864
Quote from Jay in Knock 'Em Down
Martin: Hello, Cameron. I thought I smelled failure and cheap hair spray.
Cameron: Oh, hello, Martin. You're looking unwell.
Martin: Could you do that thing you did last year where you lose and then you try and throw a chair but not realize it's bolted down and wrench your back and then curse at me while I wave a trophy in your big red face? Could you?
Cameron: [laughs] Boy, look at you. You're all worked up. It must have been a tough day assistant managing that Jo-Ann Fabrics.
Martin: It's a Michaels and you know it, you son of a bitch!
Jay: [to Cameron] Fine. I'll do it. I don't like that guy. But what happens if somebody I know comes in here and thinks I'm living a secret life?
Cameron: Jay, trust me, if someone you know comes in here tonight, they're living a secret life.
Modern Family Quotes
‘Knock 'Em Down’ Quotes
Quote from Cameron
Jay: No one's gonna believe I'm gay.
Cameron: Oh, why, because you're not flouncy enough? Jay, that's offensive. There's all kinds of gays. You've got your Broadway gays, your gym gays, your twinks, your bears, your otters, your "Hey, girl" gays. You've got your pups, your cubs, your chubs. And most prominently, you've got your "Average Joes who you would never know are gay" gays.
Jay: What the hell is an otter?
Cameron: Lane 20. White pants. Look, you don't have to do anything differently. Just be yourself. You're gay enough.
Quote from Cameron
Cameron: Well, you better start feeling it soon. We need to win so I can stick it to that smug Martin Sherman.
Gloria: Who's Martin Sherman?
Cameron: Only my archrival.
Jay: I thought your rival was that blond Christmas caroler.
Gloria: No, it's the Spanish teacher at his school.
Mitchell: Cam has lots of rivals especially if you count that bag boy-
Cameron: I told you never say his name.
Mitchell: I didn't say his name. I don't know his name.
Cameron: It's Todd. Always putting my canned goods on top of my produce. I'd like to squash his squash.
Quote from Cameron
Cameron: We won! We won! This is the fifth-happiest moment of my life!
[aside to camera:]
Cameron: Adopting Lily, marrying Mitchell, high school football championship and sitting behind Sarah Jessica Parker at Wicked.