Phil Quote #776
Claire: What is that?
Phil: You think the kids are home?
Claire: That sounds like more than our three. Oh. Oh, they think we're not home, and they're having a party. I'm killing them.
Phil: No, no, no. No, no, no. A. It's my turn to kill them. B. you need to order up those massages. It's under "Best Number One U.S.A. Coca-Cola Good Time Massage."
Quote from Dylan
Dylan: Can I say one short thing? I came to this house a broken man after my mom threw me out for her new boyfriend. And then I found out I was getting let go from the limo company the same night Haley goes to a party without me. So I had nothing and no one. And then you... [cries]
Cameron: Okay. Come on. Tell him.
Mitchell: Let him finish.
Dylan: I'm sorry. I mean, gay dudes have always been nice to me. I mean, super nice. But nothing like this. I guess what I'm trying to say is-
Mitchell: Oh, my God. He's gonna sing.
Dylan: [playing guitar and singing] So many years living life underwater Came up for air in the room of your daughter I never knew I would find my answer in my ex-girlfriend's uncles' house with the tiny pink panther.
Quote from Hit and Run
Phil: [aside to camera] I'll admit it. I'm turned on by powerful women: Michelle Obama, Oprah, Condoleezza Rice, Serena Williams... Wait a minute.
Quote from En Garde
Phil: [aside to camera] What does it take to make a great salesman? It's no big secret. You just follow the ABC's of salesmanship: Always Be Closing. Don't Ever Forget Great Home Ideas Just Keep Lurking Mostly Nearby.
Often, People Question Realtors' Sincerity. Take Umbrage. Violators Will- Oh, shoot