Haley Quote #162
Haley: [aside to camera] Our neighbor's out of town, and she's paying me to move her car on street cleaning days. Now I would just park it in her driveway, but she already has a camper and a cord of wood there. Pretty sure she's a lesbian. Anyway, easy money, right? How do I tell her I snapped a branch on her beloved lemon tree? I mean, she boils the leaves to add a scent to her own work boot oil. Did I mention she plays in two softball leagues?
Modern Family Quotes
‘Fulgencio’ Quotes
Quote from Luke
Luke: [aside to camera] I accidentally called my teacher "mommy." My "friend" Reuben went around and told everyone. "Oh, hey, Reuben, do you remember that class field trip to the zoo when the zebra rushed the fence and you peed your pants?" I didn't tell anyone, not even on the bus ride home when he had to sit next to mom-- Ms. Bockman! Damn it!
Quote from Phil
Phil: Hey, kids. How was your day?
[aside to camera:]
Phil: I knew the answer to that question. I'd had kind of a busy day going around solving everyone's problems. I started by going to see my buddy Stavros the florist. That's when I realized my kids didn't understand the concept of killing with kindness because they'd never seen it. So I decided I'd prove it to them by going on a huggacidal rampage.