Phil Quote #86

Quote from Phil in Undeck the Halls

Claire: This is unacceptable, and I want to know who did this. Hmm?
Phil: Nobody, huh? I guess the couch did it to itself. Guess it came home after a tough day, lit up a cigarette and then it burned itself. Is that what happened? Because that makes no sense.
Claire: If whoever is responsible doesn't come forward, your father and I are just gonna have to punish all three of you.
Haley: What?
Claire: Yeah.
Luke: That's not fair!
Phil: I can forgive the smoking, but I can't forgive the lie.
Claire: No.
Phil: Or the smoking. No one wants to confess, huh? No? That's fine, 'cause you know what happens next? We cancel Christmas!


 ‘Undeck the Halls’ Quotes

Quote from Frank

Phil: [imitates static on video chat] Come in, Florida. Over. Mom? Dad?
Frank Dunphy: Hello, Philip.
All: Merry Christmas Eve!
Frank Dunphy: Merry Christmas Eve!
Phil: A little- Little lower, Dad.
Frank Dunphy: [deep voice] Merry Christmas Eve!

Quote from Cameron

Cameron: Andrew. Ensemble. Uh, I know it's no accident that you're here on my street tonight. And I- I just wanted to say to you all that you sound great. And merry Christmas.
Andrew: Wow. Even your apology is off-key.
Scott: Not cool, buddy. [drops Santa sack, decks Andrew] Well, I should, uh, probably scoot.
Cameron: But-But- But what about forgiveness?
Scott: You were nice. He was naughty.

Quote from Phil

Phil: [on video chat] Hey, Pops, here's the tree. And, uh, there-there's the, uh- there's the ornament you sent us.
Claire: Right here. Right here.
Phil: There are the stockings, hung by the chimney by Claire.
Frank Dunphy: Ah! Still funny, Son.