Modern Family - Phil Quote #23
Phil: He's a little jumpy.
Claire: Oh, go figure. A teenage boy doesn't want to hang out with his girlfriend's dad.
Phil: I thought we were past all that. I'm all about taking it to the next level.
Claire: Really? I thought you were all about keeping it real.
Phil: Yes, but the whole point of keeping it real is so you can take it to the next level. Did you really not know that?
Quote from Gloria
Gloria: [aside to camera] I always wanted a daughter. To dress her up with pretty dresses do her hair, her nails, her makeup. [chuckles] No one knows this, but for the first year of his life, I made up Manny like a girl and told everybody that he was my daughter. [laughs] Ay, but just for a few times. I didn't want to mess with his head. When he found the pictures, I told him that it was his twin sister who died.
Quote from Phil
Phil: [aside to camera] The thing about me and Jay is that our relationship's always been stuck In that primal place where it started. You know, he's the old silverback protecting his females. Then along comes this younger, stronger gorilla, swinging in, beating his chest, you know. Naturally, the ape ladies come running, presenting their nice scarlet behinds. Papa ape wants to stop all that, but he can't, you know. That's- That's life. I'm not the enemy. The enemy is poachers.
Quote from Manny
Claire: Alex and I can't just disagree. I mean, she has to turn everything into a fight.
Manny: Hmm, a strong, independent woman. Sounds like somebody else I know.
Claire: I was never hostile, thou. This- This whole thing with the dress- Never had this problem with Haley.
Manny: Maybe Alex doesn't want to compete with her big sister. Maybe she's trying to create her own identity. Put her in a dress and she disappears.
Claire: For one afternoon.
Manny: I wouldn't give up being myself for even one second.
Claire: Wow. Sometimes it's hard to remember you're only 10 years old.
Manny: [with a milk mustache] And three-quarters.
Quote from Slow Down Your Neighbors
Phil: [aside to camera] I wish I were one of those people who thrives on the danger of leading a double life. You know, Bruce Wayne, Peter Parker, Hannah Montana.
Quote from Hit and Run
Phil: [aside to camera] I'll admit it. I'm turned on by powerful women: Michelle Obama, Oprah, Condoleezza Rice, Serena Williams... Wait a minute.
Quote from The Last Walt
Claire: [aside to camera] Walt, our elderly next door neighbor, died. He and Luke were pretty close, so we have to tell him. I'm a little nervous about it.
Phil: I think we should break it to him slowly.
Claire: Like how?
Phil: Well, first we'd say, "Luke, your friend Walt has a cold. You shouldn't go over there." Next day, "Bad news.
Walt's in the hospital, but he's still cracking jokes with the nurses." Next day, "They're trying an experimental drug. Fingers crossed." Next day, "His body rebelled. He's in a coma." Next day, he rallies. Next day, coma. Next day, coma. Next day, coma. Next day, eye flutter.
Claire: Stop. Just stop. Stop.