Cameron Quote #993
Quote from Cameron in Ringmaster Keifth
Keifth Banks: To the matter at hand. The swap will be difficult. Fortunately, I have had a bit of experience with misdirects just tell the audience to keep your eyes on the center ring! They won't even notice the trapeze act suffering through the more vivid stages of food poisoning.
Cameron: That happened. I was there.
Mitchell: Oh.
Keifth Banks: First, I will release a live peacock, an exotic beauty of the Orient into the yard.
Cameron: Magical.
Keifth Banks: Then, I will need something to lure him inside to draw the family's attention. Do you happen to have any Andalusian filberts?
Mitchell: No.
Keifth Banks: Then Cheez-Its will do. Naturally, everyone will be transfixed. And while they're distracted, we will swap out the pigs, the dinner will be saved, and the show will go on. Just let me sneak a peek at the backyard.
Modern Family Quotes
‘Ringmaster Keifth’ Quotes
Quote from Gloria
Gloria: What is this? We don't need to put aside money for Manny's college. I already took care of it. When Manny was born, I didn't want to rely on anyone, so I started saving money from my paycheck. Eventually, I made enough money for Manny's college, so if anything happens, he'll be okay.
Jay: That's amazing. How did I not see this in the bank statements?
Gloria: Why would I put money that I might need to run away with in the middle of night in the bank? I put it in my disappear bag.
Quote from Gloria
Gloria: The money has to be here somewhere. This is all the stuff from when we first moved in together.
Jay: Why do we have a box of doll heads?
Gloria: Oh, I guess you think it's a coincidence that we have never had evil spirits in this house.
Quote from Cameron
Cameron: Okay, get ready to pig out!
Mitchell: In six to eight hours.
[aside to camera:]
Cameron: I did Thanksgiving dinner last year, and it didn't go well.
Mitchell: Cam blew up the turkey and made the goat kill itself.
Cameron: Anyhoo, today is my comeback meal, and I decided to keep it simple and roast a pig. So, you just dig a hole, you put down a bed of coals, then a layer of banana leaves, lower the pig, cover it with burlap and tin foil, and bam! Six hours later, you dig it all up, put it on a platter, and bam! Dinner is served.