Phil Quote #703
Claire: Honey, just put on something else, and take down the makeup.
Haley: Why are you guys acting like this is my fault? Everybody was drinking, everybody ran. I just got caught. If anything, I'm the victim here.
Phil: What?! Just stop- Just stop talking, Haley. You're not the victim here. You're the one who screwed up! You made one bad decision after another, and now you're about to blow everything your mother and I worked so hard to give you. And the worst thing is, you don't seem to care. We all got up at 3:00 A.M. this morning to bail you out of jail! We haven't eaten a thing, and you know what I haven't heard from you yet? "I'm sorry, Mom. I screwed up, Dad. Please forgive me." Now put on some real clothes. We'll see you at the hearing. Do not be late! Come on.
Haley: Where are you going?
Claire: To get that man a waffle.
Modern Family Quotes
‘Arrested’ Quotes
Quote from Luke
Lily: What does this do?
Luke: I don't know, but thanks to Obama, you're paying for it.
Quote from Jay
Jay: [on the phone] What are you doing there?
Mitchell: They asked me to come along in case they needed a lawyer.
Jay: Shouldn't they have a real lawyer?
Phil: Oh, God. Should we?
Mitchell: I am a real lawyer, people. Environmental law is a thing.
Jay: Don't get all sensitive on me. I mean someone who doesn't defend pandas.
Mitchell: Yeah, dad, 'cause that's what I do. I-I defend pandas in court.
Phil: That's adorable.
Jay: You know what I'm talking about. Haley needs somebody who knows criminal law, like Perry Mason.
Mitchell: Okay, so I'm not a real lawyer, but Perry Mason is?
Quote from Phil
Claire: What are you wearing?
Haley: What? What's wrong with it?
Claire: Honey, you are fighting for your future in front of a disciplinary committee, not entertaining the secret service.
Haley: In "Legally Blonde," Elle won her case because she was true to herself and dressed cute.
Phil: Haley, this is real life, not an excellent movie.