Claire Quote #155
Quote from Claire in Two Monkeys and a Panda
Claire: [on the phone] Look, Phil, I need you to take care of dinner for me.
Phil: What's wrong?
Claire: Well, Alex ripped Haley's favorite sweater and now I'm driving around from store to store trying to find the exact same one before Haley finds out.
Phil: Don't do that. Just explain to her what happened.
Claire: Uh-uh. Haley's not gonna understand.
Phil: Sure, she will.
Claire: No, Phil, you don't understand. I'm trying to avoid this turning into a whole big thing.
Phil: Then just get her something close. She'll never know the difference.
Claire: Phil, could you just take care of dinner, sweetie? That's all I'm asking.
Phil: I'm just saying there's a simpler way to do this.
Claire: There is no simpler way. Just make dinner. Thank you.
Phil: Hello? [to all the women in the salon] What?
Modern Family Quotes
‘Two Monkeys and a Panda’ Quotes
Quote from Claire
Claire: [aside to camera] More than anything I want my girls to stop fighting and be close. I want them to share clothes and do each other's hair and gossip about boys, like I used to do with Mitchell.
Quote from Haley
Haley: Now, Mom, that's my favorite sweater. I just got it.
Claire: You know what you girls need to learn to do? You need to learn to share. Because that's what sisters do. All right, Haley, nothing's gonna happen to your sweater. Right, Alex? Hmm?
Haley: Okay, fine. Then I will just go put on your favorite nerdy T-shirt the one with the guy from Back to the Future on it.
Alex: That's Albert Einstein. And it is not nerdy.
Quote from Jay
Jay: [aside to camera] I went to a funeral last Saturday and it got me thinking about where Gloria and I were gonna end up after we die.
Gloria: Yeah, it's been a fun week.
Jay: I don't like loose ends. So I made a few calls. I found these people selling a couple of primo plots in the best cemetery in town. Not that I'm gonna go there anytime soon.
Gloria: Don't be so sure. With all that bacon that he eats.
Jay: Well, I gotta give my cholesterol pills something to do.