Claire: Everybody, Haley says that Dylan is a musician, and he writes some great songs.
Phil: Play something, bro.
Dylan: Well, I guess so, if you want me to. We could all use a nice tune right now. This is actually a song I wrote for Haley. It's called "In the Moonlight."
Cameron: Lovely title, Dylan.
Dylan: Thanks. [playing guitar and singing] The stars are falling from the sky And you're the reason why The moon is shining on your face 'Cause it finally feels It's found its place 'Cause, baby, baby, I just want to do you do you Do you want to do me do me Underneath the moonlight the moonlight? Baby, baby, Maybe I will steal you steal you Just so I can feel you feel you Maybe that would heal you heal you on the inside.
Claire: She's so not going.
Phil: Not a chance in hell.

Phil: Boy, things with your mom got pretty intense down there, huh? All like East Coast/West Coast. You feelin' me?
[aside to camera:]
Phil: Act like a parent, talk like a peer. I call it "peerenting." I learned it from my own Dad who used to walk into my room and say, "what's up, sweathog?"

Mitchell: Mom. Mom, what are you doing to her legs?
Dede: Tai chi. I did it every day in Sedona. Cameron, you should try it. [Cameron puts down scone]
[aside to camera:]
Cameron: Mitchell's mother has a problem... with me. Last Christmas, for example, she gave me a piece of exercise equipment and a lettuce dryer. So, to recap, I gave her a gorgeous pair of diamond earrings, and she gave me a hint.