Previous Episode Next Episode 
Other People's Children

‘Other People's Children’

Season 5, Episode 17 -  Aired March 12, 2014

The families split up for a day of activities: Gloria and Claire take Lily dress shopping; Mitchell and Cameron join Alex and Manny at a museum; and Jay imparts his practical wisdom on Luke as they build a toolbox together. Elsewhere, Phil helps Any record an anniversary gift for his girlfriend.

Quote from Haley

Scott: Hey.
Haley: "Hey"? That's what I get after I waited for you all afternoon?
Scott: Uh... You look good?
Haley: I know that. You were supposed to pick me up hours ago.
Scott: You were, like, the first or second person I texted after I woke up.
Haley: Aww! That's so sweet. Did it even occur to you to come to the door?
Scott: Who comes to the door?
Haley: A gentleman. Could you at least open the car door for me?
Scott: Now can we go?
Haley: You know what? Go take another nap. I'd rather wait for someone who'd walk through a blizzard for me and only honks to support the troops!
Scott: I don't understand you.
Haley: Neither do I!


Quote from Mitchell

Cameron: How about that daughter of ours? She marches to the beat of her own drum, huh?
Mitchell: Yeah. Exactly. S-so, why are we so concerned what two nerdy teenagers think of us? Isn't the true mark of intelligence being able to admit what you don't know?
Cameron: Shh. Here comes Manny.
Mitchell: Oh, my God. Did he hear me?

Quote from Alex

Alex: [aside to camera] If I'm being honest, I had to get out of there. I was exhausted from having to dumb it down all day.

Quote from Jay

Luke: Really? The neck?
Jay: Yeah, a kiss on the neck opens all kinds of doors. Last one. Great job, champ. Who said you can't build anything?
Luke: My dad, the police, a doctor.
Jay: You got a gift. Trust me. Take shop.
Luke: I think I'm gonna. Hey, how'd you get to know so much about everything?
Jay: From my dad, mostly. He taught me how to use a drill, change a tire, fake an injury when a buddy asks you to help him move. Everything a man needs to get by. I'm just glad I have someone to pass it on to.
Luke: You've got Manny.
Jay: Mm. Manny came to me kind of fully cooked. And I was an idiot with Mitchell, and by the time this guy gets old enough, who knows how much I'll remember? These are my prime wisdom-giving years.

Quote from Jay

Jay: Joe, I know you're all about the boobs right now, but trust me the neck.

Quote from Andy

Phil: In space, no one can hear you scream.
Andy: What?!
Phil: In space, no one can hear you scream!
Andy: I can't hear you! In space-
Phil: Oh, I just got it. That's good. That's good.
Andy: Thank you.
Phil: That's awesome.

 Page 4