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It's the Great Pumpkin, Phil Dunphy

‘It's the Great Pumpkin, Phil Dunphy’

Season 9, Episode 5 -  Aired October 25, 2017

Phil and Claire want to go all out in celebrating Halloween, but it seems nobody else shares their enthusiasm. Mitchell and Cameron are frustrated by how long it's taking Jay to finish their kitchen, while Gloria and Joe are getting a little tired of their house guests.

Quote from Alex

Alex: You suck! To think I wasted so much time on such a weepy, clingy, Pez-eating snore! I can't believe I sat there and pretended to be a doll as you brushed my hair! You are almost the worst boyfriend I have ever had!

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Quote from Phil

Phil: [v.o.] As families get older, you have two options: you can force everyone together, or you can accept that traditions die and people move on. Unless you happen to have a giant pumpkin.

Quote from Jay

Jay: All right, here's what happened. Right after you sent the text saying the kitchen was done, the inspector popped in for a little surprise visit, nails us with four violations, which pushes us back for a couple of weeks now. Blame me. I can take the hit from Cam. You stay with Claire 'cause I can't take the hit from Gloria.
Mitchell: Right.
Jay: Bup-bup-bup-bup-bup! Not a word. I do all the talking. Because you're a terrible liar.
Cameron: Hey. There you are. Good day?
Mitchell: Mm-hmm.
Cameron: Mm-hmm? What... what's that supposed to mean? You only say that when you're guilty. [sniffs] You smell like smoke. Oh, my God, did you burn the kitchen down again?
Jay: It's like you don't want me to help you!

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