Luke: Trust me, I've had enough Halloween mischief for one lifetime. I'm ready for this now.
Janice: You are such a mature person. I can't even imagine you as a wild child.
Luke: Oh, yeah. Five years ago, we hit this one house. The family was always calling the cops on us for lighting off fireworks. Standard stuff, TP, sugar in the gas tank... but then I noticed they had like 20 of those stupid garden gnomes.
Janice: Oh, my God.
Luke: I know, so douchey. So we posed them having sex, rang the doorbell, and then when they opened the door, we blew them up. [laughs] Are you not getting it? It's kind of subtle, so...
Janice: That was my house.
Luke: But... you live in a condo.
Janice: Now. Years ago, my husband's father died and left us his antique gnome collection. Marty wanted to keep them in the house. They soothed him, he said. 'Cause the constant fireworks were always triggering his PTSD. So, I insisted he put his sole inheritance outside, where you blew them up.
Luke: Life's funny.
Janice: [faint laughing] Yeah. Yeah, the next day, I was supposed to meet him at couples therapy. But I didn't make it 'cause my car died. Sugar in the tank. So I missed the appointment. He went for a coffee, fell in love with the barista, and now I am living in a condo, dating a friggin' child! [gets up]
Luke: Janice. This may be a bad time to mention it, but... I don't have enough money for the valet. [Janice takes the bottle of wine from the table]