Luke: I can't believe Haley's not going to the prom and Alex is.
Alex: What's that supposed to mean?
Phil: I know I keep saying it, Haley, but you should be going. It's a major moment in a teenager's life, and you're missing it.
Haley: Proms are lame. It's just an excuse for dressed up dorks to ride in limos and hump each other.
Phil: Okay. Now I don't like the idea of Alex going.
Claire: Sweetie, I think we're fine. It's- It's Alex.
Alex: What's that supposed to mean?
Luke: It means you're a geek.
Alex: You know what? You know what? I might just go crazy tonight and... and... and hook up all over him. [all laugh] Why are you laughing? That's not funny. I'm not even gonna wear my glasses!