Phil: Ow! Damn it! Why, Australia?! Why?!
Wise Australian: Hey, mate. How's it going?! Everything okay here?
Phil: Not really.
Wise Australian: You don't mind me saying, you look a bit beaten up.
Phil: Yeah. I love your country, but your country doesn't love me back. Australia's rejected me.
Wise Australian: You see this right here? That's from a croc bite. This one here on my back I was hit by a tram in Melbourne. This right here, that's an irregular mole. Should probably get that checked out.
Phil: Uh-huh.
Wise Australian: Point is Australia is nice to tourists, but it's tough on its own people. Congratulations, mate. You're one of us.
Phil: Are you saying what I think you're saying?
Wise Australian: I think I am.
Phil: I'm crocodile Dunphy?
Wise Australian: That's not what I was saying at all.
Phil: Is that a kookaburra, which are born blind, or... [the man has disappeared] Mom?