Claire: Tonight, you cook him his favorite meal. You open the best bottle of wine. And just as the two of you are sitting down to enjoy it, you break up with him.
Mitchell: What? Why?
Claire: Because then, as he is at his lowest, you pop the question. He goes from agony to ecstasy! It's so romantic.
Mitchell: You're kidding, right?
Claire: More traditional? Okay. All right. You look into his eyes And you say, "I saw a doctor. He found a small dark mass."
Mitchell: What are you?
Claire: And then just as he begins to cry, you pull out a black box with a ring in it. There's your small dark mass! It's genius!
Mitchell: Y- You're a disaster.
Claire: You could go the disaster route, too. Did you ever hear how I told Phil we were gonna have Luke? I said, "Thousands of children die every day..."