Jay: Hey, I was serious about we should play again sometime. It's a crazy thing that if I'd been less of a hard head when you were a kid, we could have had 20 years in this dumb game.
Mitchell: No, it was half my fault. I mean, I-I used to be pretty sensitive. So y-you really weren't "Cat's in the Cradling" me back there?
Jay: Of course not.
Phil: How have I not heard of this song you keep talking about?
Jay: You have. It's the worst.
Phil: It's the schmaltziest.
Pepper: Unbearable. I'll play it on the way back. I have it on my iPod phone.

Carl: Ready to play, Phil?
Phil: I can't, Carl! My boy's sets are in a play!

Psychic: I get the feeling that something wonderful has happened to someone you know.
Gloria: Yes, it's Manny. He got the lead role in the school play.
Psychic: Yes, that's it.
Alex: Okay, I think you might have met her halfway on that one.

Psychic: Do you feel that? A presence has just entered the room.
Alex: Or the A.C. kicked in. Gloria, I have to say something.
Psychic: It's your abuela.
Gloria: [gasps] Which one? Is she smoking a pipe, or is she smoking a cigar?
Psychic: A cigar.
Gloria: My mother's mother. I miss her so much.
Psychic: She says she misses you, too.
Gloria: I wish that she was here now to see Fulgencio Joe.
Psychic: She has seen him, and she says he is beautiful.
Gloria: He is, isn't he? Ay. Tell her that I love her.
Psychic: She knows.
Gloria: Thank you so much for that. [to Alex] You see now?
Alex: I think I do.

Cameron: Okay, Manny, quick question. Did you forget the notes I gave you or just choose to ignore them? Where are you going with that?
Debbie: We need an extra one up front. Mr. Namagachi decided to come.
Cameron: Oh, you mean the disgraced teacher I replaced suddenly has an interest in this production?
Debbie: He's parking his Peugeot right now.
Cameron: Wow, the vultures are officially circling.

Manny: [aside to camera] He was glorious. Every note, every nuance I was transported, and I was furious. But my quarrel wasn't with Luke. It was with God.

Claire: Save a seat for your sister.
Frank: Excuse me. I think that's my seat.
Phil: Dad! What are you doing here?
Frank: Are you kiddin' me? My grandson paints the sets for a play, and I'm not gonna drive in from Florida, hmm?

Carl: Hey, thanks for meeting me here.
Phil: No reason we can't mix business with a little pleasure. Am I right?
Carl: I'm just excited to find someone who enjoys this sport as much as I do.
Phil: Well, I'm gonna be straight with you, Carl. You got a ton of inventory to move, and you're in need of a serious realtor. [Phil and Carl jump up on the trampoline] Hup hup!
Carl: So how firm are you on your commission?
Phil: As I think you can see, I'm quite flexible.
Carl: I'll be honest, Phil, I like you. I think I'm ready to move forward with this.
Phil: Really? Well, I'm thrilled. Hey, you know, we could make this official.
Frank: Nice form, son! I'm talking about that contract, of course.
Phil: You still got it, dad. That's my dad.

Girl: That could have been you out there.
Manny: No, it wouldn't have been right.
Girl: I'm sure you would've gotten some of it right.
Manny: Not what I meant.