Modern Family Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- Season 4
- Season 5
- 501 Suddenly, Last Summer
- 502 First Days
- 503 Larry's Wife
- 504 Farm Strong
- 505 The Late Show
- 506 The Help
- 507 A Fair to Remember
- 508 ClosetCon '13
- 509 The Big Game
- 510 The Old Man & The Tree
- 511 And One to Grow On
- 512 Under Pressure
- 513 Three Dinners
- 514 iSpy
- 515 The Feud
- 516 Spring-A-Ding-Fling
- 517 Other People's Children
- 518 Las Vegas
- 519 A Hard Jay's Night
- 520 Australia
- 521 Sleeper
- 522 Message Received
- 523 The Wedding (Part 1)
- 524 The Wedding (Part 2)
- Season 6
- Season 7
- Season 8
- Season 9
- Season 10
- Season 11
Modern Family

Modern Family is a mockumentary that follows the extended Pritchett family with three diverse households that show what it means to be a modern family.
Starring:
Ed O'Neill, Sofia Vergara, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Eric Stonestreet, Sarah Hyland, Ariel Winter, Nolan Gould, Rico Rodriguez, Aubrey Anderson-Emmons, Jeremy Maguire, Reid Ewing.
Recurring Actors:
Adam DeVine, Nathan Lane, Fred Willard, Shelley Long, Elizabeth Banks, Benjamin Bratt, Chazz Palminteri, Dana Powell, Kevin Daniels, Rob Riggle, Stephanie Beatriz, Christian Barillas.
Original Run: 2009-2020.
Quote of the Day
Quote from Manny in A Stereotypical Day
Manny: [aside to camera] I live simply now, and it's good for me. Might it also help my chance of kissing her one day? Yes. And if that requires living in a world where the government chooses all our songs, so be it.
Popular Quotes
Quote from Claire in The Closet Case
Claire: [aside to camera] That was the moment I realized Phil wanted me to kick Dylan out so he could be the cool one. Well, I can be cool, too. I'm cooler than cool. I'm frigid.
Quote from Cameron in Unplugged
Cameron: [affected accent] The tribe elders foretold that though I lay with fire-haired man, the giving hawk would bring us baby with her skin the color of sweet corn, which my people call maize.
Mitchell: Okay. Please stop.
Mr. Plympton: Well, uh-
Cameron: Knowledge is her sustenance. Like so much maize which, you'll remember, means corn.
Mitchell: What if I was a single dad?
Quote from Gloria in Unplugged
Jay: Why didn't you just tell me this in the first place?
Gloria: Ay, like you would be okay with me stealing a dog.
Jay: No.
Gloria: Exactly. That's why I didn't tell you. Now the dog is happy, Manny can sleep, and we have pickles.
Jay: Okay, it worked out this time, but don't forget that stealing is against the law. Now maybe in Colombia-
Gloria: Ah, here we go. Because in Colombia, we trip over goats and we kill people in the street. Do you know how offensive that is? Like we're Peruvians!
Quote Collections
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The creative ways Phil Dunphy answers the phone.
12 quotes
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Quotes from Clive Bixby and Juliana, Phil and Claire's romantic alter egos.
23 quotes
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“Closets Closets Closets Closets”
Jay Pritchett's tales from decades in the closet industry.
22 quotes
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A selection of quotes featuring Phil Dunphy's creative, G-rated exclamations and curses.
19 quotes
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“Cameron Tucker's Tales from the Farm”
Cameron Tucker's tales of growing up on a farm in Missouri.
31 quotes
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Enjoy a selection of quotes from Halloween episodes of Modern Family.
39 quotes
Trending Quotes
Jay: You know, it's... Thing about babies, you... you fall in love with a baby with the cutest little fat folds, and then... bam... they're gone. But it's okay, because in its place is this... toddler with the greatest laugh on Earth. And then one day, the toddler's gone, and in its place, a little kid that asks the most interesting questions you've ever heard. And this keeps going on like that, but you never get the chance to miss any of them, 'cause there's always a new kid to take the place of the old. Until they grow up. And then... in a moment, all those kids you fell in love with walk out the door at the same time.
Waitress: Jesus.
Jay: Oh, I don't mean to be a bummer. I'm just saying it goes fast. Like the expression... "You never know the last time you pick up your kid."