Modern Family Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- Season 4
- Season 5
- Season 6
- Season 7
- Season 8
- Season 9
- Season 10
- 1001 I Love a Parade
- 1002 Kiss and Tell
- 1003 A Sketchy Area
- 1004 Torn Between Two Lovers
- 1005 Good Grief
- 1006 On the Same Paige
- 1007 Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
- 1008 Kids These Days
- 1009 Putting Down Roots
- 1010 Stuck in a Moment
- 1011 A Moving Day
- 1012 Blasts from the Past
- 1013 Whanex?
- 1014 We Need to Talk About Lily
- 1015 SuperShowerBabyBowl
- 1016 Red Alert
- 1017 The Wild
- 1018 Stand By Your Man
- 1019 Yes-Woman
- 1020 Can't Elope
- 1021 Commencement
- 1022 A Year of Birthdays
- Season 11
Modern Family
Modern Family is a mockumentary that follows the extended Pritchett family with three diverse households that show what it means to be a modern family.
Starring:
Ed O'Neill, Sofia Vergara, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Eric Stonestreet, Sarah Hyland, Ariel Winter, Nolan Gould, Rico Rodriguez, Aubrey Anderson-Emmons, Jeremy Maguire, Reid Ewing.
Recurring Actors:
Adam DeVine, Nathan Lane, Fred Willard, Shelley Long, Elizabeth Banks, Benjamin Bratt, Chazz Palminteri, Dana Powell, Kevin Daniels, Rob Riggle, Stephanie Beatriz, Christian Barillas.
Original Run: 2009-2020.
Quote of the Day
Gloria: [aside to camera] Manny is very passionate, just like his father. My first husband is very handsome, but too crazy. It seemed like all what we did was fight and make love. Fight and make love. Fight and make love. One time, I'm not kidding you, we fell out of the window together.
Jay: Which one were you doing? I'm hearing this for the first time!
Popular Quotes
Quote from Claire in The Closet Case
Claire: [aside to camera] That was the moment I realized Phil wanted me to kick Dylan out so he could be the cool one. Well, I can be cool, too. I'm cooler than cool. I'm frigid.
Quote from Cameron in Unplugged
Cameron: [affected accent] The tribe elders foretold that though I lay with fire-haired man, the giving hawk would bring us baby with her skin the color of sweet corn, which my people call maize.
Mitchell: Okay. Please stop.
Mr. Plympton: Well, uh-
Cameron: Knowledge is her sustenance. Like so much maize which, you'll remember, means corn.
Mitchell: What if I was a single dad?
Quote from Gloria in Unplugged
Jay: Why didn't you just tell me this in the first place?
Gloria: Ay, like you would be okay with me stealing a dog.
Jay: No.
Gloria: Exactly. That's why I didn't tell you. Now the dog is happy, Manny can sleep, and we have pickles.
Jay: Okay, it worked out this time, but don't forget that stealing is against the law. Now maybe in Colombia-
Gloria: Ah, here we go. Because in Colombia, we trip over goats and we kill people in the street. Do you know how offensive that is? Like we're Peruvians!
Quote Collections
-
The creative ways Phil Dunphy answers the phone.
12 quotes
-
Quotes from Clive Bixby and Juliana, Phil and Claire's romantic alter egos.
23 quotes
-
“Closets Closets Closets Closets”
Jay Pritchett's tales from decades in the closet industry.
22 quotes
-
A selection of quotes featuring Phil Dunphy's creative, G-rated exclamations and curses.
19 quotes
-
“Cameron Tucker's Tales from the Farm”
Cameron Tucker's tales of growing up on a farm in Missouri.
31 quotes
-
Enjoy a selection of quotes from Halloween episodes of Modern Family.
39 quotes
Trending Quotes
Jay: You know, it's... Thing about babies, you... you fall in love with a baby with the cutest little fat folds, and then... bam... they're gone. But it's okay, because in its place is this... toddler with the greatest laugh on Earth. And then one day, the toddler's gone, and in its place, a little kid that asks the most interesting questions you've ever heard. And this keeps going on like that, but you never get the chance to miss any of them, 'cause there's always a new kid to take the place of the old. Until they grow up. And then... in a moment, all those kids you fell in love with walk out the door at the same time.
Waitress: Jesus.
Jay: Oh, I don't mean to be a bummer. I'm just saying it goes fast. Like the expression... "You never know the last time you pick up your kid."
Gloria: Maybe the details are in Jay's phone. But I hope not, because everything is very secret on there.
Jay: Don't know if you caught that subtle cue. She's mad at me.
Gloria: He did something very terrible that he doesn't want me to know about.
Jay: "Very terrible"?
Gloria: Until you tell me what it is, I'm gonna think the worst possible thing, like maybe you killed somebody. But you don't have the stomach for that, do you?
Quote from Dylan in Heart Broken
Dylan: Can I say one short thing? I came to this house a broken man after my mom threw me out for her new boyfriend. And then I found out I was getting let go from the limo company the same night Haley goes to a party without me. So I had nothing and no one. And then you... [cries]
Cameron: Okay. Come on. Tell him.
Mitchell: Let him finish.
Dylan: I'm sorry. I mean, gay dudes have always been nice to me. I mean, super nice. But nothing like this. I guess what I'm trying to say is-
Mitchell: Oh, my God. He's gonna sing.
Dylan: [playing guitar and singing] So many years living life underwater Came up for air in the room of your daughter I never knew I would find my answer in my ex-girlfriend's uncles' house with the tiny pink panther.