‘Reese Cooks’
Season 2, Episode 18 - Aired March 4, 2001
When Reese gets in trouble and Lois and Hal realize they are all out of punishments, Hal tries to shower Reese with attention by taking him to a cooking class. Meanwhile, Malcolm's classmate, Cynthia (Tania Raymonde), invites the whole school to her birthday party, and Francis is unable to focus on his school work with a deadline looming.
Quote from Cynthia
Malcolm: Cynthia, I didn't want to tell you like that. I'm sorry.
Cynthia: No need to be sorry. I should be thanking you. Thank you, Malcolm.
Malcolm: Cynthia...
Cynthia: You know what?! There's only so much crying I can do in one day, and just looking at you makes me want to cry. So, if you don't mind, I'd like to leave you now.
Quote from Francis
Eric: All right, no more distractions, Francis. I'm tired of yelling at you. I'm not saying Harvey's last heat wasn't exciting...
Francis: You didn't have to kill him, you know.
Eric: Yes! Yes, I did. Now, please, as a friend, just focus!
Francis: I'm sorry. I know I tend to procrastinate, but when a deadline nears, I always manage to get it done.
Eric: Okay. I'll check on you in 30.
Francis: [holds empty soda can] Uh, you'd better take this.
Eric: Why?
[Francis squeezes the empty soda can to make noise]
Quote from Reese
Reese: I can't believe I really made this. You know, Dad, if you work really hard at something, it shows.
Hal: Yes, son. Yes, it does.
Cooking Teacher: Mmm... Class, during our next session we'll be holding a little competition. Friends and relatives are encouraged to attend, and don't be discouraged if you feel a little outclassed by some of our more promising students. We're all here to have fun.
Reese: What do I get if I win?
Cooking Teacher: A six-inch paring knife and a bread cloche.
Reese: Awesome.
Quote from Cynthia
Cynthia's Dad: May I help you?
Malcolm: Hi. I'm Malcolm. I don't know if you remember...
Cynthia's Dad: I'm not sure. I have a vague recollection of you throwing a brick through my daughter's window. Oh, and I think you're the kid who ruined her party and humiliated her in a public toilet. How am I doing? Now, if you don't mind...
Cynthia: It's okay, Dad.
Quote from Cynthia
Boy: Hey!
Cynthia: Can I help you?
Boy: Yeah. We're here for Cynthia's party. We found these things in the library.
Cynthia: Uh...
Malcolm: I thought you handed out uninvitations.
Cynthia: I thought you said no one would come. [to the group] Come on in... I guess.
Quote from Francis
Eric: Can we please just go?
Francis: Yeah, just two more hours and then we'll head home.
Eric: Francis, the project is due tomorrow.
Francis: Okay, don't worry. We have an eight-hour ride home. We'll do it then. By the way, this is Terri and her friend Robin.
Eric: Hi. I'm Eric. I'm totally going to summer school.
Quote from Malcolm
Malcolm: [to camera] You know, I just realized something. Parties suck. The music always stinks, the food's bad, and who cares if no one talks to you? People are such phonies anyway.
Cynthia: Hey, Malcolm.
Malcolm: Hey, Cynthia. Great party. I like the music, and what's in the dip?
Cynthia: Ooh, you know what? I'm gonna need that chair.
[Malcolm awkwardly stands around, tries dancing and then decides to just lean against the staircase]