Hal Quote #515
Lois: Hal, you're taking it back.
Hal: What about the boys? Don't they get a say in this?
Dewey: Yeah, Mom, it'll be great for entertaining.
Lois: No, they do not get a say in this because we are not keeping it.
Hal: Well, we're... kind of locked in.
Lois: We're what?
Hal: Lois, you don't get deals like this without making a commitment. It's zero percent interest. If you factor in inflation, it's almost like they're paying us 2,800 bucks.
Lois: $2,800! I can't believe you! You went behind my back, you spent money you had no right to spend to buy a pile of lumber and tubes.
Hal: Don't worry. It has very detailed assembly instructions, which I won't go anywhere near because Malcolm's doing it.
Malcolm: I don't mind.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Hot Tub’ Quotes
Quote from Hal
Lois: What is this?
Hal: It's a hot tub, Lois.
Lois: Are you out of your mind? We can't afford a hot tub.
Hal: That's what I said, too, but then the sales guy showed me how wrong I was. Boys, get out here!
Lois: Hal, I can't believe you did this without me. You know we always make these kinds of decisions together.
Hal: It was an in-store promotion. We got 20% off on the spot. Plus a tub club card, plus free caulking. And that's where they kill you, Lois - the caulking.
Quote from Reese
Reese: So you can shoot free throws better than me. Fine. Whatever. Big deal. That's all you've got on me. Can you stop a ceiling fan with your head? I didn't think so. And look at this. [holds up Popsicle in front of own face] My Popsicle's like twice the size of yours. What a score. I am totally...
Malcolm: Reese. [pulls Reese's Popsicle next to his]
Reese: Oh. Never mind.
Quote from Hal
Hal: Did I tell you? You just can't have a care in the world when you're in a hot tub. It's like a trip back to the old amniotic sac.