Dabney Quote #172
Quote from Dabney in Hal's Friend
Dorene Hooper: Where's my boy?! What have you done with my poor, delicate boy?!
[A sweaty Dabney walks out wearing a bandana across his head and a bandolier of paint pellets across his chest while holding his paintball gun]
Dorene Hooper: Oh, my God! [to Malcolm] This is your fault, you evil little Svengali! I knew I shouldn't let Dabney have any friends! Now, Dabney, where-
Dabney: Get the car. We're going home.
Dorene Hooper: Dabney, you've never spoken to me like this before.
Dabney: Well, get used to it. I'm not your little boy anymore, Mom. [puts glasses on] I'm your little man.
Dorene Hooper: Oh, my. Oh. Oh, Dabney. Oh!
More Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Hal's Friend’ Quotes
Quote from Hal
Hal: Boys, you see what I have? This is a movie I asked you to return three weeks ago.
Reese: What if we want to watch it again?
Hal: I found it in the dishwasher. 21 days times $2.99 a day, that's...
Hal: What?! What is it going to take for you boys to learn some responsibility? You can't just go through life letting things slide? Sooner or later, you are going to learn that- [lights go out] Is it the tenth already?
Quote from Otto
Otto: Someone was out of bed bright and early this morning.
Francis: [chuckles] Yeah, Gretchen left me a note. Can't seem to find it anywhere. I think it may have been about your violent night terrors.
Otto: What are you talking about?
Francis: I don't speak terrified German, but you must have been having some pretty horrific dreams.
Otto: That's ridiculous. I never dream.
Otto: I never dream. I go to sleep; eight hours later, I wake up with a slight sore throat just like everybody else.
Francis: You screamed for hours.
Otto: I think it was you that had the bad dream, but don't worry, I know just what to do. I will give you a nice, oily massage before bedtime, you will sleep like a baby.
Dabney Hooper Quotes
Quote from The Bully
Dabney: You know... Reese's embarrassing defeat could have serious consequences for us all. He'll be working extra hard to prove he's still on top of the food chain.
Lloyd: You're saying we could actually have a meaner, more vicious Reese on our hands?
Dabney: It's very possible. We can't avoid the beatings, but I suggest that, as a wedgie deterrent, we go without underwear for the next several days.
Quote from Hal's Friend
Malcolm: You have to shoot. You have to do this.
Dabney: Mom was right. I could be home watching Dark Victory right now.
Malcolm: You have to fight back! Just pull the trigger!
Dabney: But there could be adverse consequences.
Malcolm: That is your mother talking! Just shoot it! If you want to be any kind of man, shoot it now.
[After Dabney shoots the paint gun up in the air, the pellet ricochets off the ceiling and hits a big kid]
Stevie: [gasps] Haul ass!
[Dabney starts firing directly at the big kid]
Dabney: Brush your own damn hair!
[Dabney knocks the big kid out with his helmet and proceeds to shoot at him as he lays on the ground]
Dabney: [vicious yell] [rapid popping] Get your own damn towel! [yells] Aaah! One hundred, ninety-nine, ninety-eight, ninety-seven...
Stevie: I call... Dabney's team.