Reese Quote #431
Quote from Reese in Reese Joins the Army: Part 2
[the two privates dump Reese in a cell with the rest of his red team:]
Private James: Freak held his breath until he turned blue and then passed out. [both walk away]
Reese: Yeah! Whoo! Haven't done that in a while.
Private Martinez: You okay?
Reese: I'm fine. I know how to get us out of here.
Private Martinez: That's impossible. Look around. We're in prison, man.
Reese: Wrong. We are not in prison. We're grounded. And there's always a way to get out of being grounded. You can pry up some floorboards... set your bed on fire. There's only two things you have to remember. You need a diversion and the little guy gets screwed. But that's okay. He's too little to do anything about it. You're going to have to eat some dirt, about three pounds of it.
Private Franklin: What good's a diversion going to do? We're tied up.
Reese: I guess your brothers never tied you up and left you in a Dumpster on trash day. Okay, start eating. It's not fatal, it only looks like it.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Reese Joins the Army: Part 2’ Quotes
Quote from Hal
Malcolm: Dad? I made coffee. You want some?
Hal: Oh, hi. I was just singing. Always have a song in your heart, son. Thanks. [sighs] You know what the worst thing is? I have always hated that job. I wanted to quit ten years ago when they started deducting for sick days. I wanted to quit a year ago when they started making us vacuum out our own cubicles. If I'd have done that, they would have found another patsy and I wouldn't have been in this mess. They should have just fired me. I mean, I was a terrible employee. I never read a memo, I came in late, I blew off Fridays. What the hell is wrong with those people? Just promise me that you'll learn from my mistakes. Don't ever settle, Malcolm.
Malcolm: I won't.
Hal: I'm going to go make love to your mother one last time.
Malcolm: [to camera] I probably wasn't going to sleep tonight anyway.
Quote from Hal
Police Officer: [over bullhorn] You're not alone. We've called every available police officer in the Tri-County area. Are you sure you don't need any equipment? We've got some needle-nose pliers.
Hal: No! Stay away! [calmly] Everyone has to stay away! This thing is picking up a lot of vibrations right now. I said get back. Do you have a death wish, Officer?
Lt. Sortino: I'm Lieutenant Sortino with the bomb squad. I'm here to help. What's your name?
Hal: There's no time for introductions. We've got a level five explosive with a gravity timer and a percussion fuse.
Lt. Sortino: What bomb squad did you say you were with?
Hal: Millbrook. I'm off duty. Came by to return a library book. You've got a better selection here. And they charge 50 cents a day back home. Now, I know the fines help pay for the place, but that's really a very small part of the budget. Now, if we are finished playing 20 questions, I've got lives to save.
Lt. Sortino: Since you guys seem more up to date in Millbrook, I'm just going to go call your supervisor, see if he can send some backup.
Hal: Hoo-hoo! Sure. If you can find him. [mimes drinking] Okay, I'm going to try to detach the coaxial... Oh, no! I cut the wrong wire! It's gonna blow! [dives on the backpack] Tell my wife I love her! Five! Four! Three! Two! One!
[As the gathered police officers and fire fighters flinch and look away, Hal disappears with the backpack]
Quote from Hal
Malcolm: Can I have the potatoes?
Hal: You can have anything you want, son, if you're willing to work for it. Just reach for the stars and never let go. I should have told you that a long time ago. And when you write an angry letter, hold onto it for a day. You might not feel the same in the morning. And never invest in a friend's restaurant. Never. You know what? I'm not hungry. Come on, Dewey, let's go teach you how to shave.
Dewey: Great!
Hal: When you tip a valet, always fold your dollar up real tight. That way, by the time he sees what he's got, you're down the block.