Reese Quote #665
Reese: I know I'm the new guy, but you've been on the phone for a half hour and you haven't closed this deal? Remember your ABCs. Always Be Selling.
Quote from Hal
Hal: What do you say, Reese? You want to take the new boat out this afternoon? Maiden voyage. Just you and me. Father and son slicing through the waves, wind in our hair. And look, I re-did the aft bathroom.
Reese: Sorry, Dad, I start my new job today.
Hal: Oh, come on! You don't actually do any work the first day. You're just filling out forms and deciding on a nemesis.
Quote from Lois
Lois: All right, Dewey, I know what's going on. [starts looking around her room] I know it's you. If it were Reese, he'd be bragging to everyone about it. Malcolm doesn't have the patience. So, that leaves you, Dewey. If I had any proof, we'd be having this conversation while I was walling you up inside your bedroom closet. [sighs] This is about the volcano, isn't it? All right, I acknowledge that perhaps I was a little inconsiderate of your needs, but that in no way justifies these petty attacks. Still, we have to move on. So, here's the deal: In the future, I promise to be more attentive and aware of your feelings, not that being the loving mother I am, I wouldn't be doing that anyway. Ah-ha! [sighs] And in return, you will promise to stop this stupid campaign to drive me crazy. Just give me a little sign that we understand each other. [two taps] Good.
[When Lois leaves her bedroom, a tree branch is repeatedly tapping against her window]
Quote from Baby: Part 2
Fran: When your milk duct is blocked, it's called mastitis. It's important that you let your baby suck the obstruction out of the breast, and don't be alarmed if the baby then vomits up a cottage cheese-type substance. Now, join me over here...
Dewey: Like I needed another reason to hate cottage cheese.
Reese: I've been kind of zoning in and out here, but did she just say milk comes out of those things?
Malcolm: Reese, that's what they're for.
Reese: My God! Women are the cows of people!
Quote from Motivational Speaker
Lois: Good morning, Malcolm. There's money on the counter for your yearbook.
Malcolm: I don't want to buy a yearbook. I don't want anything that will remind me I ever went to that stupid school.
Reese: How can you say that? Being part of a group is important. Don't you care about loyalty? I think loyalty is the most important thing there is.
Lois: Well, I'm glad at least one of my sons knows something about that.
[Reese sees the mail man walking down the drive:]
Reese: [shouts through the window] Hey! What are you doing here?! This isn't your house! You don't live here! We live here! This is our house! What do you want?! Huh?! What?! What?! What?! What?! What?! What?! What?! What?!