Hal: What's this? The food's all green.
Lois: I added a little food coloring. It's artistic. I'm being artistic.
Reese: Mom's right. I always thought art was just stupid paintings of old dead guys in drag, but I was wrong. Art can be doing something, or even undoing something. Like when I blew up the Muller's mailbox, that was art, and I didn't even know it.
Hal: Green eggs and toast. I do not like green eggs and toast.

Lois: I still can't believe Mr. Barnes let you borrow his fancy RV. This is so classy. This is like Buckingham Palace on wheels.
Hal: He ripped one on the elevator just before the CEO got on, and I took the blame for it. That's the way things work in the corporate world.
Lois: You're unselfish, and it paid off.

Man: This guy's really captured something here.
Woman: This piece is as vicious as it is funny.
Hal: What are you looking at?! Haven't you ever seen a man sweep his lawn with a broom before? [applause] Okay, that's enough. I've had it. Go on, get out of here, you punks. [crowd cheers] [someone throws a frisbee at the R.V.] What the hell is wrong with you people?! Doesn't anybody have respect for personal property anymore? You can think about that for a few days until I give this back to you. [crowd cheers]