‘Poker’
Season 3, Episode 8 - Aired January 6, 2002
Hal feels he was discriminated against when he joins Abe and his friends for a game of poker. Meanwhile, Lois takes Reese to her dancing class, while Stevie makes Malcolm the star of his video project.
Quote from Malcolm
Abe: Gonna see me?
Malcolm: [whisers] He doesn't have the flush.
Hal: [whispers] What?
Malcolm: He has a tell. He licks his lips when he's bluffing.
Hal: I'll see your five, and raise you five.
Abe: Fold.
Hal: Hah-ha!
Quote from Stevie
Malcolm: He raises four.
Stevie: Your four... five more.
Hal: Malcolm, maybe you should-
Malcolm: You wanna play?
Hal: Fine.
Abe: I almost feel sorry for them.
Stevie: Almost. [both laugh]
Quote from Lois
Hal: I'm going to the ball game with Abe this weekend. He only had one ticket. He invited me.
Lois: That's great, dear. I'm glad- What's this?
[Lois watches footage of herself dancing with Rudy]
Lois: He was trying to get rid of me! Hal, turn this off. Hal!
Hal: Oh, my God, I can't believe how beautifully you dance!
Lois: Hal, you are such a fool. [they dance] [crash]