‘Houseboat’
Season 3, Episode 1 - Aired November 11, 2001
The family spend their vacation on a houseboat with Abe, Kitty and Stevie. Meanwhile, Francis looks to get himself emancipated so he can drop out of military academy and go work in Alaska.
Quote from Abe
Kitty: Oh, look at all this lovely scenery and nature. This will be wonderful.
Abe: Dear, did you pack my hat?
Kitty: Oh, I'm sorry, honey. You should have asked me to.
Abe: No problem. I'll just create one out of newspaper.
Lois: Everything OK?
Kitty: Everything's wonderful. We're on vacation.
Quote from Stevie
Reese: Spirit camp? So, you girls are?
Malcolm: Cheerleaders.
Stevie: Bad... cheerleaders!
Quote from Malcolm
Hal: [wakes up] What happened? Did you catch something?
Malcolm: No. We're not gonna catch anything.
Hal: I know. [laughs] This is really awful, isn't it? [sighs] I don't think there's a darn fish in this whole lake. You know what? It doesn't matter. It's just nice bein' out here with you.
Malcolm: Dad.
Hal: Mmm?
Malcolm: You know the other day at the store when I pretended not to know you?
Hal: Yeah. That was a new low.
Malcolm: Well, there was this... girl.
Hal: Really?
Malcolm: I'm sorry.
Hal: I know.
Quote from Malcolm
Malcolm: [to camera] Three weeks of slave labor, my relationship with Dad will never be the same and... I can't stop smiling.
Quote from Hal
Hal: Dewey. Remember when we were both stuck on the buoy and you said you wanted to be a ventriloquist? Well, I thought we could do it together.
Dewey: [mumbles] Thanks, Dad.
Hal: [mumbles] You're welcome, son.
Quote from Lois
Lois: Oh, my God!
Hal: What is it?
Lois: It's Francis! He quit school. He's on his way to Alaska!
Hal: Well, that's ridiculous. He can't just take himself out of school. He needs our permission.
Lois: No, he doesn't. He got himself legally emancipated.