‘Dinner Out’
Season 2, Episode 4 - Aired November 15, 2000
Kitty (Merrin Dungey) invites Lois and her family out to dinner. Meanwhile, Francis throws a party at the academy when Spangler is entertaining a visitor.
Quote from Stevie
Reese: Seriously, this has got to stop. I'm actually starting to feel bad. And plus, I'm kind of getting bored creatively. Oh, my God! Is that a snake?
Malcolm: Stevie, don't. [Stevie looks down]
Reese: Sucker.
Stevie: Snake... I'm an idiot.
Quote from Abe
Kitty: Stevie, what the hell do you think you're doing?! You are in so much trouble! This behavior is totally unacceptable. We are at a restaurant... what is wrong with you?
Stevie: [inhales]
Kitty: Don't you take that tone with me! You just wait till we get home!
Reese: He bruised the bone.
Lois: Oh, like you didn't deserve it. [to Kitty] Good for you! I knew you had it in you.
Kitty: Shut your trap!
Waiter: Excuse me, would you mind please keeping it down?
Kitty: Would you mind going to hell? And I absolutely did order tea! How hard is it to remember a stupid drink order, you idiot?
Abe: Kitty, there's going to be some changes...
Kitty: And you, Mr. Ho Hos in his sock drawer! Who do you think you're kidding?
Lois: Honey, you have to pace yourself.
Kitty: And another thing, Don Juan, there are two people in that bed!
Hal: You know, I really don't feel very good.
Kitty: And I had it with your poker nights and your idiot frien...
Quote from Spangler
Spangler: Cadets... as you know, I don't often reveal my... personal side, but after 20 years of separation, my mother has agreed to visit with me this weekend. She is a very demanding woman, and I haven't seen her for a long time. I want things to go well. [looks directly at Francis] That means I will have no time for antics, shenanigans, hooliganism or tomfoolery. [walks on] There will be no problems which take me away from time with Mother. This is important to me, which makes it...
All: Important to us.
Spangler: So it is crystal clear. I will not be disturbed this weekend.
All: Yes, sir!
Spangler: As you were.
Quote from Stevie
Reese: Oh, great. Who spilled?
Malcolm: [looks down] Aw. [Reese punches Malcolm] Ow.
Stevie: Circle game? I want to... play.
Malcolm: I don't know, Stevie. It's... it's pretty rough.
Reese: Oh, come on, quit babying him. If he wants to play, let him play. Now, remember, Stevie, don't look at this... [Reese punches Stevie when he looks down] ...uh... or this. [Reese punches Stevie again]
Stevie: He's... good.
Quote from Lois
Lois: Well, this is nice. I've been looking forward to this for a long time. I don't know why we didn't do this sooner.
Hal: Do I feel flush?
Lois: No.
Waiter: Would anyone like a drink before you order?
Hal: Oh, yeah.
Lois: Uh, he'll have a diet soda.
Waiter: And you, sir?
Abe: Uh... what the hecklemonade.
Kitty: I'll have an iced tea.
Waiter: Sorry, we're out.
Kitty: Oh, uh, well, then, I'll have a...
Lois: Wait a minute. What's that guy having?
Waiter: That's hot tea.
Lois: This is ridiculous. You have tea, you have ice. Make her some iced tea.
Kitty: Oh, no, no, no, that is fine. I would love a hot tea.
Quote from Lois
Lois: You have a real problem. Have you never yelled at anyone in your entire life?
Kitty: I just don't see what it accomplishes.
Lois: Are you kidding? Most of the time, if you're not yelling, they're not listening.
Kitty: Lois, our situation is difficult enough without me adding a bunch of negativity to it.
Lois: What situation? You mean Stevie? He's fine! He's not going to wither away because you blow off steam every once in a while. Hey, why don't you give both of you a break?
Quote from Spangler
Francis: I think this is where they nested.
Spangler: I'd say we got off lucky. This happened once before in '72 we had to bulldoze the amphitheater.