Malcolm: What are you gonna do to her?
Reese: I don't know what you're talking about. OK. I've been dying to tell someone. Malcolm, I'm gonna see them.
Malcolm: What?!
Reese: I'm going to be nice to her, make her my girlfriend and get her to take her top off.
Malcolm: You're crazy!
Reese: That's what I thought at first, but I've got it all figured out. I've been working on this for days. Tomorrow, I'll reveal an embarrassing secret that makes her feel trusted. Friday, I'll sneak a kiss, then apologize. Three days later, I actually ask her out. She catches me crying. Make out session. She discovers a love letter in my pocket. Heavier make-out session. All culminating in March 8, Double D Day.
Malcolm: You're pure evil!
Reese: Who's more evil, me or the person who told me?
Malcolm: You!
Reese: Yeah, but you'd still be in trouble. I bet she'd never forgive you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go make a mix tape.