Malcolm: She's not... We're just friends.
Lois: Malcolm, look at me! Oh, my God, it's true! Malcolm, no! You do not do this yet!
Reese: I saw them behind the 7-Eleven French kissing. That's with tongue, Mom.
Lois: Don't you wanna go to college? Don't you care about your future? Malcolm, you are not mature enough to prioritize between homework and some tramp!
Hal: Your mother's right, son. I waited until I was eleven before I kissed my... Wait, how old are you? Never mind. What I'm saying is, it was a different time back then. There was a war on.