Malcolm: [to camera] Ever since the zoo, I've had a new lease on life. It's amazing how something as simple as almost being eaten by tigers can put things in perspective. It just feels so good to be happy again. Of course, why do I always have to learn my lessons the hard way? No one else does. I mean, why does the universe think it has to almost kill me to get a point across? My life sucks. I'm going to bed.