Lois: [on the phone] Uh, your father got us tickets to see Jimmy Buffett.
Francis: And this concert wouldn't happen to be on Wednesday night, would it? My birthday?
Lois: Uh, yes, it is, but that has nothing to do...
Francis: Oh, now I get it. You can't afford to bring me home, but somehow you find money for Jimmy Buffett tickets.
Lois: Francis, that's not the way it is at all. They were free tickets.
Francis: Sure they were.
Lois: A friend of your father's gave them to us.
Hal: He's not really a friend.
Francis: You know, you guys should really get your stories straight before you try to ditch me on my... [whispers] birthday.