Lois: There's this stupid bike-a-thon at work. Some idiot made a big stink about how the store's not doing enough for charity.
Reese: Then don't do it.
Lois: I have to. I'm the idiot. And I... I... I... can't ride a bike. And it's very embarrassing.
Reese: So you really can't ride a bike?
Lois: No.
Reese: Hey, everybody! My mom can't- [Lois tackles Reese and holds his head to the ground]
Lois: You don't understand! My father didn't believe in training wheels!
Reese: Mom!
Lois: He just tied me to the bike and pushed me down the hill.
Reese: Mom, there's glass down here!
Lois: I came back with three teeth in my hand, and he just pushed me down all over again. After that, I just told people I knew how to ride. And I've been living with this lie ever since!
Reese: Mom!
Lois: If you tell anybody, I will kill you! Do you hear me?