Abe: I've got something for Hal that I think may do the trick.
Lois: [sighs] Abe, I thought we were done with this.
Abe: I thought we were, too, Lois, until 3:00 this morning, when I found myself in a collectibles auction site and saw this baby. [Lois is silent as Abe opens the case] Yes, it's a Vulcan lyre with ten pre-programmed Christmas carols. [Christmas music plays]
Lois: Abe, I'm sorry. I know you're trying to help, but this is not what Hal needs. [music stops]
Abe: You're right. I guess I got carried away and lost sight of what got us started in the first place: to hook Hal up with a member of the original cast of Star Trek.
Lois: That's not what got this started. Abe, Hal's father died.
Abe: And I will not let him die in vain. I will call Sulu. I will call Chekhov. And if they say no, so help me, I will call the Gorn.
Lois: Abe, stop. Just stop. I appreciate your trying to help, but I don't need any of this. I'm going to take Hal to a bed and breakfast for a nice weekend, and that's it. He just needs some emotional comfort.
Abe: So you think a weekend of nurturing and sex is going to get him through this? Do you even know this man?!