‘Bowling’
Season 2, Episode 20 - Aired April 1, 2001
As Reese and Malcolm attend a bowling party while Dewey stays home as a punishment, two alternate realities show how the night would go depending which parent, Lois or Hal, goes bowling and who stays home.
Quote from Lois
Lois: You see, Malcolm? Isn't it great when you don't have to worry about the gutters? You can just bowl and have fun.
Quote from Reese
Beth: I wish we could be alone somewhere.
Reese: Me, too. Wait, I still have to tell you that joke. Would you like to take a walk on the beach, feel the salt... You know what? That's not a good joke.
Quote from Reese
Reese: Hey, Mom, I've got to tell you, I wasn't on board at first with you staying, but tonight was... Well, it was magic.
Quote from Lois
[split-screen:]
Hal: So, how'd it go?
Lois: So, how'd it go?
Lois: Next time, you take 'em.
Hal: Next time, you take 'em.
Quote from Reese
Reese: Way to go, Connie!
Beth: Listen, maybe you shouldn't...
Reese: Connie, Connie. Connie, Connie, Connie. [all chant] Connie, Connie, Connie... Oh, man, that was classic. Okay, let's go make out.
Beth: I don't think so.
Quote from Malcolm
Malcolm: [to camera] We're going bowling tonight with some kids from school. It's, like, four boys and six, you know, girls. Not that I care. Doesn't make any difference to me.