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36Quotes from ‘Woooo!’

How I Met Your Mother: Woooo!

408. Woooo!

Aired November 17, 2008

When Lily invites Robin to join her work friends on a girls' night out, Lily is surprised to learn they are "Wooo! Girls". Meanwhile, Barney gets Ted the opportunity to pitch for the design of the new Goliath National Bank headquarters.

Quote from Barney

Ted: Swedish architecture "collective".
Robin: Lame.
Lily: Pretentious.
Ted: "We're not a company. We're a collective."
Barney: I know. [French accent] "We are Swedish. We are so cool with our baguettes and our Eiffel Tower."
Marshall: Dude, Sweden's not France. You know that, right?
Barney: Oh, it's France.

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Quote from Barney

[flashback to Barney and Marshall at work:]
Barney: Marshall, the conference call's about to start.
Marshall: I'm sorry, guys, I gotta go.
[later, on the roof of the building:]
Barney: [v.o.] And then we go up to the roof of the building... and drink beer.
Marshall: This is awesome. Drinking at work.
Barney: We're basically Mad Men.
Marshall: We are! We're such Mad Men!
Barney: I'm gonna go smack a secretary on the ass.
Marshall: That's totally what they would do on that show.
Barney: What show?

Quote from Future Ted

Future Ted: [v.o.] What's a Woo Girl? Let me explain. A Woo Girl is a type of young woman, who, like the cuckoo bird or the whip-poor-will, gets her name from the signature sound she makes. Now, a woo can be elicited in many different ways. From a certain song coming on the jukebox, to half-priced shots, from a ride on a mechanical bull, to, well, pretty much anything.

Quote from Barney

Barney: Why, Lily Aldrin, you sly minx. I've been saying for years that our gang need a Woo Girl, and here you've been hiding a whole batch of them from me.
Lily: We do not need a Woo Girl. No one needs a Woo Girl.
Barney: Be careful, Lily. The world absolutely needs Woo Girls. If there were no Woo Girls, there'd be no Girls Gone Wild, no bachelorette parties, no Las Vegas poolside bars... All the things that you hold
dearest, Lily, would be gone.
Lily: Those are none of the things...
Barney: The souvenir shot glass industry would collapse. So would the body glitter industry and the stretch-Hummer rental industry. Tiny cowboy hats would be worn only by tiny cowboys. And when"Brown Eyed Girl"
would come up on the jukebox, all you would hear... would be silence. And "Brown Eyed Girl." But who would woo, Lily? Who would woo? Would you? Would you... woo?
Jillian: Who wants to name my boobs?!
Barney: Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date with Hannity and Colmes.

Quote from Ted

Barney: Ted, am I correct that you are an architect?
Ted: My best friend would really know that, but go on.
Barney: And what are you currently designing?
Ted: Actually, we're renovating the new York Public Library.
Robin: Wow, Ted, that's huge!
Ted: No, not the New York Public Library. It's the new public library in York, North Dakota. Their books are in two sections: Fishin' and non-fishin'.

Quote from Barney

Barney: So, then, it's agreed. From now on, all ATM fees are now called Freedom Charges.

Quote from Robin

Lily: Don't be jealous. You and I hang out all the time.
Robin: Yeah, but Marshall's always there. We don't get a lot of quality time to talk, just the two of us.
Lily: That's not true.
[flashback to Lily and Robin on the couch in the apartment:]
Robin: So that's when the story gets really good. So, we go to the... [Marshall sits down next to Robin] place. And then that... guy asks about that thing with the stuff that I told you about at that place that time. Long story short... events transpired.
Marshall: Oh, my God. You and the guy from the mayor's office did it in the UN building under the desk of the
ambassador from Zaire? Nice.
[present:]
Robin: I just wish we could have some girl time. I love Marshall, but he's always talk-blocking me.

Quote from Ted

Barney: Then I think you are going to really like what happened at work today.
[flashback:]
Bilson: And so, while those bribes did destabilize the regime and caused the death of most of the royal family, it did lead to looser banking regulations in Rangoon. So yay us. Okay, last order of business. It's been decided we're going to move forward with plans for Goliath National Bank's new downtown headquarters.
[present:]
Ted: Who's gonna design it?
Barney: Was my first question.
[flashback:]
Barney: Who's gonna design it?
Bilson: We've already approached one firm about it. This Swedish architecture collective called Sven.
[present:]
Ted: Sven? Sven?
Future Ted: [v.o.] Sven was this Swedish architecture collective revered for their bold, innovative designs. I hated those guys.
Ted: I hate those guys.

Quote from Barney

Barney: So anyway, I say to Bilson...
[flashback to Barney at work:]
Barney: Bilson, with all due respect...
[present:]
Barney: No, I stand up, and I say to Bilson...
[flashback:]
Barney: Bilson, with all due respect... [stands up]
[present:]
Barney: Music. Imagine patriotic music playing.
[flashback:]
Barney: [music plays] Bilson, with all due respect, it would be terrible if a job that could go to a hard-working American architecture firm, went to a bunch of French guys. Where is our patriotism? Our sense of country? Our love of all that is...
Bilson: Look, Stinson, no one hates every other country in the world as much as I do, but you better have a point.
Barney: I do. I know a fantastic American architect who would be perfect for the job. Ted Mosby.

Quote from Robin

Lily: I swear, at school Jillian seems so un-woo-y.
Robin: Yeah, she doesn't look wooish. Maybe she only observes the high holidays, like Mardi Gras and Spring Break. Maybe she's just a cultural "woo".

Quote from Barney

[flashback to the GNB conference room:]
Ted: ...will radiate the strength and stability that is Goliath National Bank. Thank you, gentlemen. [exits to applause]
Barney: So?
Bilson: That was great. I love it.
Barney: Yes! Looks like we got our guy. I don't think we even need to meet with...
[The room is dark, three blonde men wearing sunglasses and head pieces stand in front of the conference table. Electronic music plays]
Sven: I am Sven Jorgensen. With me are Sven Pilsen and Sven Johanssen, and we are... Sven! [The Svens dance] You are Goliath National Bank. You are cutting edge. You are new. You are fresh. Women want to be with you, men wish to harm you, but the fool who dares challenge you shall be crushed! Your headquarters will tell the world of these facts. Oh, and one more thing... Don't look now! [a dinosaur-shaped structure appears in a poof of smoke] Which of you is Barney Stinson, head of the search committee?
Barney: Oh, my God. That's me!
Sven: You, Barney Stinson, are a man of power and virility. Your office shall be here, in the head of a tyrannosaurus rex.
Barney: I never knew it till now, but I've always dreamed of that.
Sven: On your large desk of Honduran rosewood shall be this button.
Barney: What does the button do?
Sven: Press it! Press it for glory!
[Barney presses the button. Fire is shot out of the dinosaur's mouth]
Barney: Yes! This is the most awesome building in the universe. There is no way this building could be more awesome.
Sven: There is a strip club in the letter "N."
Barney: Ah!


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