‘The Three Days Rule’
Season 4, Episode 21 - Aired April 27, 2009
When Ted violates the "three day rule" by texting a girl he just met, he doesn't realize he's communicating with Barney and Marshall.
Quote from Robin
[flashback to Barney and Marshall sitting with Stan in the booth in MacLaren's:]
Stan: Still nothing, huh?
Marshall: Maybe he's not in love with us.
Barney: How can he not be in love with us? We're everything he's looking for.
Marshall: I don't get men.
Stan: Uh, got to head to work.
Marshall: Will you be... Will you be back?
Stan: I'll be back when the wind and fates and chance bring me back. Which will be tomorrow. It's cheese steak day.
[present:]
Robin: Wow. It sounds like you were all over this guy. Hope his girlfriend didn't get jealous. Did he mention a girlfriend or...?
Quote from Ted
Marshall: Hey, look at this guy. How's it going best friend of 12 years?
Ted: Well, it's kind of weird, but... I had this crazy dream the other night. It's a little embarrassing.
Barney: You can tell us, Ted. This is a safe space.
Marshall: Yeah, your feelings are perfectly natural, buddy.
Ted: Here's what happened. [fast-forward]
Future Ted: [v.o.] And then I proceed to waste a half hour of those bastards' lives, telling them about this dream I had where I ate dinner with my top 5 favorite architects throughout history.
Ted: And then, at the end of the meal, Frank Gehry slides the check over to I.M. Pei, and he says, "Buddy, tonight,
your name is I.M. Paying." [laughs] Buckminster Fuller almost did a spit take. And then I woke up.
Marshall: So, that- So, that's it?
Barney: No other dreams? Nothing confusing or erotic?
Ted: Nope.
Quote from Ted
Marshall: I'm sorry, buddy. We were just trying to help you.
Barney: And, also, it was really fun.
Ted: I don't need your help, okay? I can take care of myself. And, yeah, maybe... Maybe there are some girls who wouldn't like it that I called them right away or said things too soon, but guess what? Those aren't the right girls for me. Maybe the right girl is the one who loves that I do those things because... that's just who I am, and I'm not gonna change because of some stupid Three Days Rule. Oh, and, um, Holli spells her name with an "I".
Quote from Future Ted
Future Ted: [v.o.] So I had proven that the Three Days Rule was wrong, and I was out to dinner with a pretty girl. And until right now, I've never told anyone the truth about what happened on that date.
[Ted and Holli at a restaurant:]
Holli: That's so funny! I love indie music, too. We should get married. Ha-ha. Just kidding. Or am I? Ha-ha. Just kidding again. [cut] That's it. We're totally going to Brazil together! [cut] And I went to my doctor this morning,
and he said it is all cleared up, so I'm good to go. [cut] I think I'm in love with you, Ted.
Future Ted: [v.o.] In the end, I didn't need to wait three days, but Holli really, really did. Like a lot of rules, there are times to follow them and times to not. But I will tell you this. When I got your mother's number, I called her right away.
Quote from Ted
Ted: Okay, fine. I promise. I won't call Holli for three days.
[cut to Ted in the apartment using his phone:]
Future Ted: [v.o.] But I never said anything about texting. I started things off with something cute and charming.
Ted: "I was thinking about you, so I thought I'd send you a little texty text."
Future Ted: And the moment I hit "Send", I realized it wasn't cute at all. It was the lamest thing anyone has ever said to anyone. And the worst thing about texting is that once you send it... you can never get it back. And then you wait. And just when you've decided never to text anyone again...
Holli: "I've been thinking about you, too, and how weird is it that you texted me while I was in the bath?"
Ted: [chortles]
Quote from Ted
Robin: You made your naked lady noise.
Ted: What?!
Robin: Whenever you see a naked lady, you make the noise. [chortles]
Ted: I don't do that.
Robin: Really?
[flashback to Ted walking in on Lily in the bathroom:]
Ted: God, sorry, Lily. [chortles]
[flashback to Ted and Robin watching a documentary:]
Narrator: [on TV] While the men are out hunting, the women of New Guinea's indigenous Korowai tribe wash their clothes in the river.
Ted: [chortles]
[flashback to Ted and Robin at an art exhibit:]
Ted: [chortles] That's totally a boob.
Quote from Robin
Ted: Oh, no. This is bad.
Robin: What?
Ted: She just sent me a text that was clearly meant for someone else.
Robin: "Hey, baby, I picked up some take-out from Generro's. Be home soon." Okay, yes, this sounds bad, but let's think about this, okay? It could be for a brother or maybe her sick dad.
Ted: Scroll down.
Robin: "And then I want you to do me on the couch." Okay, maybe not a sick dad. Or a very sick dad. Am I right?
[laughs] Sorry.
Quote from Barney
[As Robin arrives at MacLaren's:]
Robin: What is this?
Marshall: Oh, it's just some take-out from Generro's. I'm bringing it home for Lily.
Robin: Oh, that's weird. Holli just texted Ted something about take-out from Generro's.
[Barney shakes his head at Marshall]
Robin: Wait a second. You sons of bitches!
Barney: What?
Robin: You're Holli.
Quote from Marshall
Robin: So Ted hasn't been texting Holli at all? He's been texting you two?
Barney: Look, we knew he'd try to call her before the three days, so I swiped his phone, and I changed her number to my work cell.
Marshall: We were just gonna bust on him for calling her too soon, but then he... started texting her.
[flashback to Barney and Marshall at MacLaren's on the night Ted met Holli:]
Barney: "Texty text"?!
Marshall: Oh, Ted. Oh, poor, sweet Ted. We should... We should tell him it's us.
Barney: Yeah. Or... we pretend we're Holli, and we're in the bath.
Marshall: Yeah, that's better.
[back in his apartment, Ted chortles]
Quote from Marshall
[flashback to Barney and Marshall at MacLaren's on the day Ted met Holli:]
Marshall: That was fun. We should tell him that it's us.
Barney: Yeah, we should. Or... We tell him our favorite color is red, and we think the cowboy look is very sexy.
Marshall: Yeah, that's better.
[in the apartment, Ted is wearing the cowboy boots and texts back:]
Ted: [texting] "I'm wearing them right now, and they do look sexy."
[back:]
Barney: He put on the boots!
Marshall: He totally put on the boots! That was awesome!