Marshall Quote #291
Quote from Marshall in I'm Not That Guy
Marshall: You can really taste the beef in that lobster.
Jefferson: Right, listen, I know we're only here to screw over my client, who quite frankly deserves it... But I gotta be able to tell the guys upstairs I gave you the spiel, okay? So, first up, starting salary. [slides a piece of paper across the table]
Marshall: Okay. Here we go. This is the big number that's supposed to impress me and... [Marshall looks at the paper] Whoa, that is a big number.
Jefferson: There's also a signing bonus, uh, use of a company car, expense account, blah, blah, blah. Hey, by the way, turn around and wave to Patrick Swayze.
Marshall: Hey, I'm going to, uh, try to remain cool. But you know Patrick Swayze?!
Jefferson: He's a client. Who do you think bought us this wine? [To Patrick] Crazy, Swayze. Cheers, buddy.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘I'm Not That Guy’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Ted: Dude, come on, let's just find Bizarro me and get out of here.
Barney: Oh, oh, I get it. Ted Mosby, non-porn star, thinks this is all crude and disgusting. You know who else was considered crude and disgusting? Shakespeare. But his themes, love, lust, forbidden desire, were universal, which is why his work has stood the test of time. And so will all this. Four hundred years from now, some high school drama class will be doing a plucky, spirited production of Beef Party VII.
Quote from Barney
Future Ted: [v.o.] It was a quiet November afternoon in 2007. I was working from home, because, you know, no distractions.
[Barney rushes into the apartment at the same time Marshall comes out of his bedroom]
Barney: This is incredible!
Marshall: Oh, my God! I can't believe it!
Barney: I have big news!
Marshall: Oh, my God!
Barney: Okay. My thing's pretty huge. But fine, you can go first.
Marshall: Okay, I just found out...
Barney: I just find a porno starring Ted Mosby!
Quote from Ted
Ted: What are you... What you're talking about?
Barney: I'm talking about "Welcome to the Sex Plane", and look who plays the navigator, Ted Mosby.
Ted: Oh, it's the same exact spelling as my name.
Marshall: Okay, you know, cute coincidence, Barney. Whatever. I just got on the phone with the NR...
Ted: Oh my God. This totally explains the thing at my doctor's the other day.
[flashback to Ted at a doctor's office:]
Doctor: Open wide. I guess you're more used to saying that hearing it, huh, Ted Mosby? [laughs]
[back:]
Ted: Who is this guy? And why my doctor watching porn?