Ted Quote #1347

Quote from Ted in Knight Vision

Cassie: Oh! Oh. It's work. Should I get it? Or ignore it? Or get it? Oh! Or ignore it? Or get it?
Ted: You know, go ahead, get it.
Cassie: Okay. Ahem. [answers phone] Hello?
Knight Templar: You chose poorly.
Cassie: [on the phone] I'm fired? But teaching there was my dream job. And you guys are my only friends. You all hate me? Can I at least say goodbye to my kids? My kids all hate me?
[Ted tries to back away from Cassie, but as she starts to sob she pulls him back and cries on his shoulder]
Ted: Oh. It's okay. So, what were we about to do? I think it was, uh, meaningless something? Meaningless socks? No, it wasn't meaningless socks.

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 ‘Knight Vision’ Quotes

Quote from Lily

Reverend: Well, I talked to Barney and Robin and let me say, I am shocked.
Lily: You should be.
Reverend: Flat-out lying to me like that?
Lily: We are not misunderstanding each other.
Reverend: How dare you pretend their beautiful story is actually your own?
Lily: Come again for Lil' Fudge?

Quote from Barney

Ted: Look at this, your wedding weekend.
Barney: I know, this close to finally having sex again. It's been forever.
Ted: Oh, you and Robin been abstaining?
Barney: Talking about you, Ted. Here's the deal. Every hookup at a weekend wedding is decided at Friday night drinks. Get stuck with the wrong girl tonight, the only action you'll get all weekend is a self-five. And I don't mean the cool kind. [laughs] Self-five. That's the cool kind.

Quote from Barney

Ted: Huh. It's a big decision.
Barney: The biggest. It brings to mind that religious text which we hold most sacred. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.
[fantasy scene of Ted as Indiana Jones and Ted as a collaborator:]
Barney: Remember? They entered a chamber.
Ted: Really? I'm the one working with the Nazis?
Barney: Ted... Just... Just... Okay? They had to choose which cup was this special cup. I forget what it was called,
it was like the Holy Grail of cups.
Ted: It was the Holy Grail.
Barney: Of cups, exactly. So the Nazi confederate chose, and...
Ted: Don't make me do that, I'd rather...
Barney: Ted, Ted, the confederate Nazi chose and...
Ted: Okay. Okay. And now I'm gonna explode.
Knight Templar: He chose poorly.
Barney: Then Indy picked a cup, and...
Knight Templar: You chose wisely.
[Barney starts playing guitar and rocking out with girls in bikinis]
[reality:]
Barney: So choose wisely, Ted.