Robin: She can't see that Barney is using her, and it breaks my heart. You know, I love Patrice. We're like sisters.
Ted: You've never gotten through even one exchange without screaming at her.
Robin: Sisters fight, Ted! But the bond is always there.

Ted: And where's the worst abuser of my generosity, Barney? Or should I say, "Borrow-ney"?
Marshall: You should never say that. And I think he's out with Patrice.
Robin: Ugh, Patrice? That's still happening?
Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, you remember Patrice. She worked with your Aunt Robin.
[flashback:]
Patrice: Robin! You left your purse at the vending machine, and some guy tried to steal it! I fought him off, but I think I dislocated my shoulder.
Robin: You scratched the leather! Oh! Can't you do anything right, Patrice?!

Robin: Barney is not who you think he is.
Patrice: What do you mean?
Robin: Well, he has a book of plays he uses to trick women into sleeping with him.
Patrice: Oh, no way, Barney's my honey bear.
Robin: Actually, one of his plays is called The Honey Bear. He dresses up like Winnie the Pooh, and the next thing you know, his hand's stuck in your pot.
Patrice: Robin, you're a doll for worrying about me, but that doesn't sound at all like my Barney.
Robin: Why won't you let me help you, Patrice?!