Marshall Quote #960

Quote from Marshall in Now We're Even

Marshall: All pregnant ladies have crazy sex dreams. It's just her hormones going berserk.
Barney: So who's responsible for her rapid thigh movement this time?
Ted: Oh, my favorite was when she banged George Washington.
Barney: I liked the three-way with Bill Cosby and Papa Smurf.
Ted: Oh, he smurfed the smurf out of her.
Marshall: Yes, while The Cos smurfed off in the corner. We all remember. But here's the thing. When Lily has dirty dreams about other people, she always tells me. But this time...
[flashback:]
Marshall: Sounds like you had a crazy dream. What was it about?
Marshall: [v.o.] And then her face turned... vermilion.
Lily: Just... you and me... gettin' it on, monogamously. Monoga-me-oh-my.

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 ‘Now We're Even’ Quotes

Quote from Barney

Marshall: [flipping a color chart] Not the rose quartz of the slightly embarrassed, or the tomato red of the mildly abashed, vermilion, the color of carnal shame. Can only mean one thing: Lily dream-banged someone we know.
Barney: Okay, you caught me vermilion-handed. The truth is, I've spent the last five years trying to inception your wife.
Marshall: That movie only came out two years ago.
Barney: What movie?

Quote from Ranjit

Marshall: I had no idea that food could be this delicious.
Ranjit: Marshall, you are being crazy.
Marshall: No, no, I can handle it. If I sell my laptop, we can get seconds on those squash blossoms.
Ranjit: I mean about Lily.
Marshall: Well, you know, she's being crazy, too.
Ranjit: She's pregnant. She gets to be crazy. You have to be the sane one.
Marshall: So what, I don't get to be crazy again until the baby comes?
Ranjit: No. Then it's baby's turn to be crazy.
Marshall: When do I get to be crazy again?
Ranjit: Never. [laughs]

Quote from Ted

Marshall: So, how's living alone?
Ted: You know, it's interesting. When I first moved into my new apartment, I was nervous. For the first time in my adult life, I didn't have a roommate. But then it hit me, for the first time in my adult life, I didn't have a roommate! If I want to walk around naked, nobody cares. If I want to leave the laundry basket in the middle of the living room, nobody stops me. If I bring home soup from the deli and leave it in the fridge for two days, nobody eats it. And if I do something colossally stupid, nobody ever has to know. People make fun of the guy who stays home every night doing nothing. But the truth is... that guy's a genius. Because let's be honest, sitting around watching TV, drinking beer and eating ribs alone is what every red-blooded American would rather be doing at all times.
Marshall: Yeah, but wouldn't it be better to have someone to share the... I mean, don't you get lonely without... Yeah, that sounds pretty great.