Barney Quote #1600

Quote from Barney in The Drunk Train

Woman: Hey, our stop's next. Do you want to join us?
Ted: Yeah, I think we do.
Barney: Nah, we're good. [to Ted] Too skanky.
Ted: Too skanky?
Barney: Eh...
Ted: It's the Drunk Train. You crossed out all the stops and wrote "Vaginaville."
Barney: That's not true. That one says "Boner Gardens."

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 ‘The Drunk Train’ Quotes

Quote from Barney

Ted: What the hell happened on that train? It was absolute chaos.
Barney: Ted, when I was at M.I.T., my favorite Einstein quote was: "God doesn't play dice with the universe."
Ted: You didn't go to M.I.T.
Barney: I didn't?
Ted: Huh. I actually have no idea where you went to college. Who are you?

Quote from Ted

Barney: I was all, "Do I look like I'm from Ronkonkoma?!"
All: Oh...!
Barney: That's all you gotta say!
Ted: Oh, oh, oh, big man with a briefcase! What do you think, you're better than me?!

Quote from Barney

Future Ted: [v.o.] That night, Barney and I found ourselves in a strange, new universe called... The Drunk Train.
Barney: Where has this heavenly vehicle been all my life? Can you hear its inspiring chant, Ted? I think I can get laid, I think I can get laid. It's-it's The Little Engine with Wood, The Whore-ient Express. The Long Island Tail Road!
Ted: Oh, I got one. Thomas the Spank Engine!
Barney: Ted, that is a children's book.