Robin Quote #659
Quote from Robin in The Slutty Pumpkin Returns
Barney: Wait. Where is my cash?
Robin: Oh, yeah, I did a little exchange for ya, Canucklehead. This Canadian dollar here is called a "loonie." And this two-dollar coin? A "toonie." True story.
Barney: It's federal currency and you people talk about it like it's a Hannah-Barbera character.
Robin: Not you people, Barney. Our people.
Features in the collection: Barney Stinson: True Story.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Barney Stinson: True Story’
Quote from Barney in The Three Days Rule
Ted: Barney, the three days rule is insane. I mean, who even came up with that?
Barney: Jesus.
Marshall: Barney, don't do this. Not with Jesus.
Barney: Seriously. Jesus started the whole wait 3 days thing. He waited 3 days to come back to life. It was perfect. If he have only waited one day, a lot of people wouldn't have even heard that he died. They'd be all, "Jesus, what up?" And Jesus would probably be, like, "What up? I died yesterday". And then they'd be all, "Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude". And then he would have to explain how he was resurrected and how it was a miracle. And then, the dude would be, like, "Okay, whatever you say, bro".
Robin: Wow, ancient dialogue sounds so stilted now.
Barney: And he's not going to come back on a Saturday. Everybody's busy doing chores. Working the loom, trimming their beards. No. He waits the exact right number of days... Three.
Ted: OK, I promise, I'll wait three days. Just please stop talking.
Barney: Plus, it's Sunday, so everyone's in church already. They're all in there, "Oh, no, Jesus is dead". Then, bam! He bursts through the back door, runs up the aisle. Everyone's totally psyched. And, FYI, that's when he invented the high-five. Three days, Ted. We wait three days to call a woman because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait. True story.
Quote from Barney in Where Were We?
Barney: So he stays home all the time not getting laid? No, see, that's what you do when you have a fiancée. He should be down here celebrating. He's free. He got that red-head-tumor removed.
Ted: You should write and illustrate children's books.
Barney: You know what Marshall needs to do? He needs to stop being sad. When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.
‘The Slutty Pumpkin Returns’ Quotes
Quote from Robin
Barney: Why are you doing this to me?
Robin: Okay, you have been ripping on Canada since Justin Bieber was knee-high to a snow blower. So now this Canuck's gonna beat on you like the drummer from Yukon Blonde hopped up on Timbits.
Quote from Robin
Robin: Yo, Canada.
Barney: What? Dammit!
Robin: Ha, you answer to "Canada" now. I'll make you a deal. You wear this costume to the Halloween party tomorrow night, I'll drop it forever.
Barney: You can't be serious.
Robin: Oh, I am as serious as a poutine shortage in Chicoutimi during a curling bonspiel.
Barney: I don't know what any of those words mean.
Robin: Yes. You do.
Quote from Lily
Marshall: Baby, we should put off moving.
Lily: Why?
Marshall: Because I think the pregnancy is affecting your judgment.
Lily: No, Marshall, this is an amazing opportunity that we have to take advantage of! Just because my body is growing a fungus...
Marshall: Fetus.
Lily: ...doesn't mean that my metal factories...
Marshall: Mental faculties.
Lily: ...are in any way funicular.
Marshall: No idea.