Barney Quote #1376
Quote from Barney in A Change of Heart
Barney: Which is why nothing, not even God himself- Yeah, I said it, Beardy - is going to stand in the way of tonight being legend... Wait for it. [sneezes] Uh-oh.
Features in the collection: Barney Stinson: Legendary.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Barney Stinson: Legendary’
Quote from Barney in How Lily Stole Christmas
Robin: You have to go home and get to bed.
Barney: Oh, Robin, my simple friend from the untamed north, let me tell you about a little thing I like to call mind over body. You see, whenever I start feeling sick, I just stop being sick and be awesome instead. True story. Yeah, in two minutes, I'm going to pound a sixer of Red Bull, hop in a cab, play a couple of hours of laser tag, maybe get a spray-on tan. It's gonna be legen... Wait for it... [Barney falls asleep]
Quote from Barney in Sweet Taste of Liberty
Barney: We're going to Sascha's.
Ted: Who the hell is Sascha?
Barney: Sascha. [points to security woman] She's having friends over for drinks at her house. It's gonna be legen- wait for it, and I hope you're not lactose intolerant 'cause the second half of that word is -dairy!
‘A Change of Heart’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, the heart is a mysterious muscle. You never really know what's going on in there. So after Uncle Marshall lost his father, he decided to get his heart checked. And so did I. And so did Lily. And so did Robin. And then Marshall went again just to be sure. There was only one holdout.
Barney: I don't need to go to a heart doctor. I drink every day, I sleep three hours every night, and I have multiple sex partners. I'm doing everything right.
Quote from Barney
Lily: [singsong voice] Oh, Barney's got feeling for a girl.
Barney: Yeah. Penis feelings. Because she's hot. Guys, as you know, I only have one rule...
Future Ted: [v.o.] Barney said this a lot.
Barney: I only have one rule: if you're gonna get it on in a Port-O-Potty, do it early in the day.
Barney: I only have one rule: Never screw over a girl whose last name ends in a vowel. 'Cause she's got brothers.
Barney: I only have one rule: Never date a girl with a hook for a hand.
[present:]
Barney: Never go out with the same girl more than once.
Lily: Then why are you going out with Nora again?
Barney: There is an exception.
Future Ted: [v.o.] And it was always the same exception.
Barney: ...unless she's hot.
Barney: ...unless she's hot.
Barney: ...unless she's hot. Arr!
[present:]
Barney: And she is indeed hot.
Quote from Ted
Ted: Barney, come on, this is important. We need you around for a long time. Without you, we'd have to find some other sex-fueled, depraved animal to entertain us.