Barney Quote #1354

Quote from Barney in Desperation Day

Future Ted: [v.o.] Meanwhile, as Desperation Day turned into Desperation Night...
Barney: God, these girls are so hungry for male attention. It is like being a hunter and having the deer walk up, tie itself to the hood of your car and beg to get mounted.
Robin: Barney, this is Bev and Anna, uh, my coworkers and my friends. Bev, Anna, this is Barney, a high-functioning sociopath and my ex.
Barney: Enchanté. That's French for "What's with the purple?"

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 ‘Desperation Day’ Quotes

Quote from Lily

Lily: I decided to go to Minnesota to see Marshall. He shouldn't have to help his mom through this rough time all by himself.
Barney: You losing your mind, being alone in your apartment?
Lily: I'm getting weird! [v.o.] See, it started off with me throwing Marshall's jersey on my body pillow. And, well, things kind of spiraled from there.
[flashback to Lily sitting down for dinner with a pillow wearing Marshall's suit:]
Lily: I'm sorry I yelled like that before.
[present:]
Lily: I call him "Marshpillow." And he calls me... nothing because he's a pillow.

Quote from Lily

Ted: You think that's what she means by "baking cookies"?
Lily: Are you kidding? You're in the kitchen, it's getting hot, you start licking stuff off each others' fingers. Before you know it, she's bent over the marble island, and you're spanking her with a rubber spatula. And she's screaming, "Stop, Marshall, stop," but that's just code for "harder!"
Ted: Marshall's been in Minnesota a while.
Lily: So long!

Quote from Marshall

Marshall: I miss my dad, Ted. I miss him so much.
Ted: I know.
Marshall: Um, when I was a kid, we would spend the summers in the Upper Peninsula. And every year, we wouldn't get to the cabin till, like, the middle of the night. And so, it would be pitch black, in the middle of the woods. And I could never see anything in front of the headlights, but I always felt so safe 'cause my dad was driving. He was like some sort of superhero who could just see way out into the darkness. Now he's just gone. And it's pitch black. And I can't see where I'm going. I can't see anything.