The Captain Quote #6
Quote from The Captain in The Mermaid Theory
The Captain: So you really thought I was gonna kill you?
Ted: Well... ish.
The Captain: Oh, Ted, that's ridiculous. If I wanted to kill you, I'd invite you to my hunting lodge. It's far more remote, and I wouldn't have to worry about you turning up in some nosy fisherman's net.
Ted: See? It's stuff like that. Why- Why do you talk that way?
The Captain: Oh, I'm just jesting for sport. See, sometimes I don't bond as well with Zoey's younger friends. But I know she really likes you. I was hoping that maybe we could be buddies.
Ted: We can. We can be buddies. Just not on a boat.
The Captain: Fair enough. The hunting lodge it is.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘The Mermaid Theory’ Quotes
Quote from Future Ted
Barney: Lily, I guess that leaves just you and me. Want to hang?
Future Ted: [v.o.] And then Lily said something to Barney that insulted every fiber of his being.
Lily: Nah.
Barney: [gasps]
Future Ted: [v.o.] Wait. No. It had to be more than just, "Nah." Oh, I think she said...
Lily: You're a big... stupid octopus head!
Future Ted: [v.o.] No, that doesn't make sense. Okay, hang on. What did she say? She said, um, uh... To be honest kids, I'm having a little trouble remembering exactly what their fight was about. Hey, it was 20 years ago! I'll remember.
Quote from Marshall
Future Ted: [v.o.] There was just something about him. We couldn't put our finger on it until...
Marshall: I figured it out! I know what's so creepy about The Captain.
Robin: Okay.
Marshall: Yeah, I snapped this photo of him last time he dropped off Zoey. Observe. The bottom half of his face is smiling. Look, he seems happy. Seems like a nice guy. But the top half of his face, wants to murder you! Cheerful. Wants to murder you. Cheerful. Wants to murder you. Now, hold on. Let me ask him a question. Captain, what do you think of ice cream? Oh, he loves it!
Barney: Captain, what do you think of rainy days?
Marshall: Whoa, he hates them.
Robin: Captain, quick question: How do you feel about the Jonas Brothers?
All: Ooh.
Marshall: What-What is that?
Robin: I don't get it. I don't get it.
Marshall: He hates that he loves them.
All: Ah!
Quote from Ted
Ted: Well, Lily, you were right. Something weird happened with Zoey last night.
[flashback to Ted and Zoey at the museum:]
Zoey: Oh, that's the Captain. Yes, I call my husband The Captain, but that is the only concession I make to his seafaring ways. Hang on. [answers phone] Ahoy.