Lily Quote #469
Quote from Lily in Subway Wars
Future Ted: [v.o.] As the weeks went by, Marshall's confidence never wavered. Then it started to mess with Lily's head.
[Lily imagines a tiny Marshall appearing on the screen of the pregnancy test:]
Marshall: [cartoon voice] Negative? Well, we know it's not me.
Lily: Everything's fine. These things take time.
Marshall: Not with an Eriksen. Something must be wrong with you. Also, my mom hates you.
Lily: You know what? Just to make sure, I'm gonna pee on this again.
Marshall: What? No, you wouldn't. Somebody help me! Somebody help me!
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Subway Wars’ Quotes
Quote from Marshall
Marshall: [inner monologue] I'll show them. My body can outrun any motorized vehicle. I'm like John Henry when he beat the steam engine. All I need is a great folk song.
Marshall: [singing] Gather round, ye children To hear the tale so sweet Of a man who dared to race machines With nothing but his feet
Marshall: Suck it, grand-butt!
Marshall: [singing] Marshall Versus the machines Hyah!
Quote from Lily
Conductor: [indistinct talk over muffled P.A.]
Lily: Track maintenance?
Conductor: [indistinct talk over muffled P.A.]
Lily: 20-minute delay?
Man: How do you do that?
Lily: I grew up here, I speak conductor. Damn it!
[Lily exits the train. The doors then close and the train starts moving.]
Lily: Damn it!
Quote from Barney
Barney: I cannot stop staring at that girl's face.
Ted: Face. Huh. That's your weirdest nickname for boobs yet.
Barney: No, Ted, I'm really looking at her face.
Lily: Aw... That's actually really sweet.
Barney: Puffy cheeks, smudged mascara, slightly red nose... That girl was just crying. She's so sad and defenseless. Anyone have a condom?
All: Oh! Oh, God! No, no, no!
Lily: That's it! You know what? Five-minute time-out! Corner booth! Now.